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As the Last I May Know
An alternate history short story looking at decisions and consequences, and what it takes to pull the trigger.
At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
32 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 23, 2019
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July 4, 2022
Hugo nominee for best short story.
A decision to start or escalate a war is usually made by those who send others for slaughter. Someone makes a decision; countless other someones die. This becomes even more horrifying when wars can be fought remotely, by pushing buttons that release deadly weapons, by nuking cities from the safety of far away, the bliss of remote detachment, the privilege of not seeing the dying.
When a person has the codes that would launch a lethal weapon, what would it take for the weapon NOT to be launched?
Nyma’s country was hit - Hiroshima-like - with such a weapon a couple of centuries prior. Now they possess the same kind of deadly weapons of mass destruction. But the country’s past experience with “justified” devastation requires that any future choice to use them would be a truly desperate action, when nothing else is possible.
The solution the Order comes up with, to give the necessary hesitation to those with the power to launch the weapons - is to place the codes in the heart of a young child who is required to remain with the leader for duration of their term. To get access to the launch codes, the leader needs to murder the child with a ceremonial dagger. Kill the innocent child in front of you before killing many others with your action. Bloody your own hands first.
What if it really came down to that choice? When people are dying without you pushing that launch button and will be dying if you do? And the child with the codes in her heart is in front of you?
This is a short story from the point of view of one of those children who carries the weapons codes in her heart. The girl who writes poetry and is not sure if she’s good enough yet to forgo the rhymes. The girl who, lets face it, is a tool for “her” side rather than a person - at least for a while. The girl who fervently believes in the purpose behind this cruel way of controlling the slaughter. The girl who nevertheless really does not want to die.
Good story. A touch too didactic, perhaps, but still good. Thought-provoking. Scary. Sad.
4 stars.
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Read this story here: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
Twitter thread about the author’s inspiration for this story: https://twitter.com/sl_huang/status/1...
———————
My Hugo and Nebula Awards Reading Project 2020: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
——————
Recommended by: Dennis
“It’s not about right and wrong,” she said to him. “It’s about making it hard.”
A decision to start or escalate a war is usually made by those who send others for slaughter. Someone makes a decision; countless other someones die. This becomes even more horrifying when wars can be fought remotely, by pushing buttons that release deadly weapons, by nuking cities from the safety of far away, the bliss of remote detachment, the privilege of not seeing the dying.
“How can you justify a weapon that will vaporize an entire city in a single instant—buildings, children, hospitals, prisoners of war, millions of innocent civilian people, everything for so many hundreds of miles—gone? How is that not a war crime?”
When a person has the codes that would launch a lethal weapon, what would it take for the weapon NOT to be launched?
Nyma’s country was hit - Hiroshima-like - with such a weapon a couple of centuries prior. Now they possess the same kind of deadly weapons of mass destruction. But the country’s past experience with “justified” devastation requires that any future choice to use them would be a truly desperate action, when nothing else is possible.
The solution the Order comes up with, to give the necessary hesitation to those with the power to launch the weapons - is to place the codes in the heart of a young child who is required to remain with the leader for duration of their term. To get access to the launch codes, the leader needs to murder the child with a ceremonial dagger. Kill the innocent child in front of you before killing many others with your action. Bloody your own hands first.
“Do you truly wish to use such weapons so badly, that you would be willing to do as the law requires and murder a child of your own land with your own hands in order to gain access to them?”
What if it really came down to that choice? When people are dying without you pushing that launch button and will be dying if you do? And the child with the codes in her heart is in front of you?
“I love our people, Nyma. Can you understand that?”
“I think so, sir.” Nyma loved their people too. She’d been taught their nation’s history since before she could walk. “I think I love all people. But one thing I love most about us is how important other countries’ people are to us, too.”
This is a short story from the point of view of one of those children who carries the weapons codes in her heart. The girl who writes poetry and is not sure if she’s good enough yet to forgo the rhymes. The girl who, lets face it, is a tool for “her” side rather than a person - at least for a while. The girl who fervently believes in the purpose behind this cruel way of controlling the slaughter. The girl who nevertheless really does not want to die.
“Damn you, man! Do you think I’d ever use the blasted things if I thought I had a choice? And you want to pinch us between annihilation from overseas and a bloodbath in our own country if I have to dirty my hands the way you people set me up to? You think that won’t be the hardest day of my cursed life already?”
“I feel little pity for that,” Tej said dryly, “seeing as it would be the last day of Nyma’s.”
Good story. A touch too didactic, perhaps, but still good. Thought-provoking. Scary. Sad.
4 stars.
—————————
Read this story here: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
Twitter thread about the author’s inspiration for this story: https://twitter.com/sl_huang/status/1...
———————
My Hugo and Nebula Awards Reading Project 2020: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show...
——————
Recommended by: Dennis
July 14, 2020
3.5 stars. This Hugo award-nominated short story is free online here at Tor.com. Final review, first posted on Fantasy Literature:
Ten-year-old Nyma is chosen for a singular role in her country: to be the child whose life stands between the president’s decision to deploy devastating seres bombs in the war against their enemy. The only copy of the access codes to the seres missiles are in a capsule implanted next to Nyma’s heart. The law requires that the president personally kill the carrier child with a ceremonial dagger, to retrieve the codes to launch the bombs. Once the new president, Otto Han, is elected, Nyma is always to be near him. And despite President Han’s reluctance to grow closer to Nyma (he initially resists even knowing her name), it inevitably happens, while the war news grows more and more grim.
The theme and issue are clearly stated in this story, multiple times and in varying ways:
But I can’t quite wrap my brain around the idea of enough people agreeing to create a law that deliberately uses an innocent child as the sacrifice that the president personally needs to take, with his own hands, in order to bomb the enemy. On the other hand, Ursula K. Le Guin‘s famous short story “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas,” a thematically similar parable about the ethics of the greater good, also uses an innocent child as an even more inexplicable sacrifice, and I think that story is great. Maybe Huang’s writing style, which is far less subtle, just didn’t engage me as much as Le Guin’s did.
In any case it’s great food for thought, and is a Hugo nominee.
Ten-year-old Nyma is chosen for a singular role in her country: to be the child whose life stands between the president’s decision to deploy devastating seres bombs in the war against their enemy. The only copy of the access codes to the seres missiles are in a capsule implanted next to Nyma’s heart. The law requires that the president personally kill the carrier child with a ceremonial dagger, to retrieve the codes to launch the bombs. Once the new president, Otto Han, is elected, Nyma is always to be near him. And despite President Han’s reluctance to grow closer to Nyma (he initially resists even knowing her name), it inevitably happens, while the war news grows more and more grim.
The theme and issue are clearly stated in this story, multiple times and in varying ways:
Do you truly wish to use such weapons so badly, that you would be willing to do as the law requires and murder a child of your own land with your own hands in order to gain access to them?It’s pretty good message fiction: what if the government made it really (REALLY!!) hard for the president to pull the plug on deploying nuclear weapons? Is the loss of so many other lives, a belief in the rightness of your cause, the fear that your own country will be devastated if you don’t take action, sufficient? These are difficult questions that both President Han and the reader struggle with, and Huang doesn’t offer an easy answer. What makes it even more difficult is Nyma’s own belief in the necessity of her role, despite her wish to live.
But I can’t quite wrap my brain around the idea of enough people agreeing to create a law that deliberately uses an innocent child as the sacrifice that the president personally needs to take, with his own hands, in order to bomb the enemy. On the other hand, Ursula K. Le Guin‘s famous short story “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas,” a thematically similar parable about the ethics of the greater good, also uses an innocent child as an even more inexplicable sacrifice, and I think that story is great. Maybe Huang’s writing style, which is far less subtle, just didn’t engage me as much as Le Guin’s did.
In any case it’s great food for thought, and is a Hugo nominee.
January 21, 2020
Dying scared her. A lot. The idea of it was so impossibly big and black that she couldn’t even hold it in her head. But it didn’t scare her enough to break the faith—not when her name had been the one drawn.
this is a pretty devastating short story about the consequences of war; one which forces a look at the small details often lost in the big picture—the individuals making up the body count. it sets up a philosophical dilemma for those in power meant to confront the human cost of their decisions—if you are willing to consign your distant 'enemies' to death with the simple push of a button, killing countless innocents along with your presumed adversaries, first you gotta get your hands bloody by extracting the codes to enable that button-push out of one of your own people—a young child's living body. the psychological ramifications are nightmarish, and gorgeously wrought in a stunner of a short story. this is told from the POV of the child herself, but i would love to read a companion story, from an alternate POV, because i think she would write it so shatteringly well.
here is a twitter thread about her inspiration for the story:
https://twitter.com/sl_huang/status/1...
powerful stuff.
read it for yourself here:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
come to my blog!
August 2, 2020
***Winner of the 2020 Hugo Award for Best Short Story***
A nation on the brink of nuclear war has its president accompanied at all times by a child, the (in the beginning) 10-year-old Nyma, who carries the codes for the missiles inside her body. If president Han wants to pull the trigger and kill millions of faceless enemies, he has to kill the child first. He has to feel the consequences of his actions.
The story is told from the perspective of Nyma. She has not much else to do other than to be around the president and occasionally talk to him. So she spends a lot of her time writing poetry.
The two get to know each other over the years, while the war rages on. Decision have to be made. But which ones will it be?
Interesting premise, very nice prose. But a little something was missing for me. I feel like I should have cared more about Nyma. I should have gotten real anxious with every shift of affairs with the enemy. But for some reason I didn’t. Still, it’s a good story.
Can be read for free here: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
____________________________
Best Novel
• The City in the Middle of the Night by Charlie Jane Anders
• Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir
• The Light Brigade by Kameron Hurley
• A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine
• Middlegame by Seanan McGuire
• The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow
Best Novella
• Anxiety Is the Dizziness of Freedom by Ted Chiang ( Exhalation)
• The Deep by Rivers Solomon, with Daveed Diggs, William Hutson & Jonathan Snipes
• The Haunting of Tram Car 015 by P. Djèlí Clark
• In an Absent Dream by Seanan McGuire
• This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone
• To Be Taught, If Fortunate by Becky Chambers
Best Novelette
• The Archronology of Love by Caroline M. Yoachim (Lightspeed Magazine, April 2019)
• Away With the Wolves by Sarah Gailey ( Uncanny Magazine Issue 30: Disabled People Destroy Fanatsy! Special Issue)
• The Blur in the Corner of Your Eye by Sarah Pinsker ( Uncanny Magazine Issue 29: July/August 2019)
• Emergency Skin by N.K. Jemisin
• For He Can Creep by Siobhan Carroll
• Omphalos by Ted Chiang
Best Short Story
• And Now His Lordship Is Laughing by Shiv Ramdas (Strange Horizons 9 September 2019)
• As the Last I May Know by S.L. Huang
• Blood Is Another Word for Hunger by Rivers Solomon
• A Catalog of Storms by Fran Wilde (Uncanny Magazine, Issue 26, January-February 2019)
• Do Not Look Back, My Lion by Alix E. Harrow (Beneath Ceaseless Skies Issue #270)
• Ten Excerpts from an Annotated Bibliography on the Cannibal Women of Ratnabar Island by Nibedita Sen (Nightmare Magazine, Issue 80)
Best Series
• The Expanse by James S. A. Corey
• InCryptid by Seanan McGuire
• Luna by Ian McDonald
• Planetfall series by Emma Newman
• Winternight Trilogy by Katherine Arden
• The Wormwood Trilogy by Tade Thompson
Best Related Work
• Becoming Superman: My Journey from Poverty to Hollywood by J. Michael Straczynski
• Joanna Russ by Gwyneth Jones
• The Lady from the Black Lagoon: Hollywood Monsters and the Lost Legacy of Milicent Patrick by Mallory O’Meara
• The Pleasant Profession of Robert A. Heinlein by Farah Mendlesohn
• 2019 John W. Campbell Award Acceptance Speech by Jeannette Ng
• Worlds of Ursula K. Le Guin, produced and directed by Arwen Curry
Best Graphic Story or Comic
• Die, Volume 1: Fantasy Heartbreaker by Kieron Gillen and Stephanie Hans, letters by Clayton Cowles
• LaGuardia, written by Nnedi Okorafor, art by Tana Ford, colours by James Devlin
• Monstress, Volume 4: The Chosen, written by Marjorie Liu, art by Sana Takeda
• Mooncakes by Wendy Xu and Suzanne Walker, letters by Joamette Gil
• Paper Girls, Volume 6, written by Brian K. Vaughan, drawn by Cliff Chiang, colours by Matt Wilson, letters by Jared K. Fletcher
• The Wicked + The Divine, Volume 9: "Okay" by Kieron Gillen and Jamie McKelvie, colours by Matt Wilson, letters by Clayton Cowles
A nation on the brink of nuclear war has its president accompanied at all times by a child, the (in the beginning) 10-year-old Nyma, who carries the codes for the missiles inside her body. If president Han wants to pull the trigger and kill millions of faceless enemies, he has to kill the child first. He has to feel the consequences of his actions.
The story is told from the perspective of Nyma. She has not much else to do other than to be around the president and occasionally talk to him. So she spends a lot of her time writing poetry.
Peach petals drift down
Cheerful pink snow
And I clasp them to me
As the last I may know
The two get to know each other over the years, while the war rages on. Decision have to be made. But which ones will it be?
Interesting premise, very nice prose. But a little something was missing for me. I feel like I should have cared more about Nyma. I should have gotten real anxious with every shift of affairs with the enemy. But for some reason I didn’t. Still, it’s a good story.
Can be read for free here: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
____________________________
2020 Hugo Award Finalists
Best Novel
• The City in the Middle of the Night by Charlie Jane Anders
• Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir
• The Light Brigade by Kameron Hurley
• A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine
• Middlegame by Seanan McGuire
• The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow
Best Novella
• Anxiety Is the Dizziness of Freedom by Ted Chiang ( Exhalation)
• The Deep by Rivers Solomon, with Daveed Diggs, William Hutson & Jonathan Snipes
• The Haunting of Tram Car 015 by P. Djèlí Clark
• In an Absent Dream by Seanan McGuire
• This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar & Max Gladstone
• To Be Taught, If Fortunate by Becky Chambers
Best Novelette
• The Archronology of Love by Caroline M. Yoachim (Lightspeed Magazine, April 2019)
• Away With the Wolves by Sarah Gailey ( Uncanny Magazine Issue 30: Disabled People Destroy Fanatsy! Special Issue)
• The Blur in the Corner of Your Eye by Sarah Pinsker ( Uncanny Magazine Issue 29: July/August 2019)
• Emergency Skin by N.K. Jemisin
• For He Can Creep by Siobhan Carroll
• Omphalos by Ted Chiang
Best Short Story
• And Now His Lordship Is Laughing by Shiv Ramdas (Strange Horizons 9 September 2019)
• As the Last I May Know by S.L. Huang
• Blood Is Another Word for Hunger by Rivers Solomon
• A Catalog of Storms by Fran Wilde (Uncanny Magazine, Issue 26, January-February 2019)
• Do Not Look Back, My Lion by Alix E. Harrow (Beneath Ceaseless Skies Issue #270)
• Ten Excerpts from an Annotated Bibliography on the Cannibal Women of Ratnabar Island by Nibedita Sen (Nightmare Magazine, Issue 80)
Best Series
• The Expanse by James S. A. Corey
• InCryptid by Seanan McGuire
• Luna by Ian McDonald
• Planetfall series by Emma Newman
• Winternight Trilogy by Katherine Arden
• The Wormwood Trilogy by Tade Thompson
Best Related Work
• Becoming Superman: My Journey from Poverty to Hollywood by J. Michael Straczynski
• Joanna Russ by Gwyneth Jones
• The Lady from the Black Lagoon: Hollywood Monsters and the Lost Legacy of Milicent Patrick by Mallory O’Meara
• The Pleasant Profession of Robert A. Heinlein by Farah Mendlesohn
• 2019 John W. Campbell Award Acceptance Speech by Jeannette Ng
• Worlds of Ursula K. Le Guin, produced and directed by Arwen Curry
Best Graphic Story or Comic
• Die, Volume 1: Fantasy Heartbreaker by Kieron Gillen and Stephanie Hans, letters by Clayton Cowles
• LaGuardia, written by Nnedi Okorafor, art by Tana Ford, colours by James Devlin
• Monstress, Volume 4: The Chosen, written by Marjorie Liu, art by Sana Takeda
• Mooncakes by Wendy Xu and Suzanne Walker, letters by Joamette Gil
• Paper Girls, Volume 6, written by Brian K. Vaughan, drawn by Cliff Chiang, colours by Matt Wilson, letters by Jared K. Fletcher
• The Wicked + The Divine, Volume 9: "Okay" by Kieron Gillen and Jamie McKelvie, colours by Matt Wilson, letters by Clayton Cowles
July 1, 2020
Peach petals drift down
Cheerful pink snow
And I clasp them to me
As the last I may know.
This story is about Nyma. In the beginning, she's a 10-year-old girl belonging to a mysterious Order that plants a capsule into a chosen child's chest. The capsule contains the codes needed to fire seres missiles that can annihilate an entire city (organic and inorganic matter alike). If the respective president wants to use the seres missiles, he or she first has to kill the carrier child with their own hands using a ceremonial dagger and retrieve the capsule from the boy's or girl's chest.
Nyma is the carrier child for newly elected President Han.
Over the years, as war rages on, they get to know each other a little. Sometimes they talk about Nyma's poetry. The Order's hope is that no president will be able to kill a child themselves and thus peace reigns. But, of course, it's not that easy because even if YOU want peace, that doesn't mean the other countries think and feel the same and it's usually not about the survival of just one person ...
The basic concept of this story is not new. One of the most popular and somewhat recent examples of it being addressed is Doctor Who's The Moment (aka Eye of Discord), a sentient interface with telepathic abilities, enabling it to read the thoughts and memories of those who intend to use it (like the War Doctor).
I like that this theme keep spopping up as there are quite some creative ways of displaying the conundrum one should face before using a superweapon. Here, however, I missed a certain je ne sais quoi that would have given the story a special twist or extra gravitas.
“It’s not about right and wrong,” she said to him. “It’s about making it hard.”
I actually disagree with this notion in some way.
Of course it should be hard(er). I agree that just nodding or even pressing a button but from the safety of a bunker somewhere isn't like having to get your own hands dirty and actually killing someone yourself. There is this threshold most of us can't cross (at least not without training). And that is how it should be.
However, it is also about right vs wrong. If it's too easy, everyone would do it - some even just because they can. The two are interwoven.
There is something to be said for wars needing to take many lives. We don't like it, but then we might be motivated not to have another war exactly because of that. Owning the uber weapon that means no sacrifices on your part but total destruction for your enemy is ... too easy. As Theodore Roosevelt once famously said: "Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty…" - and it's true. That being said, having a weapon and not using it under any circumstances can be equally catastrophic, unfortunately.
So yeah, the concept of the story makes you think. And since we're talking about children carriers, it might have even more of an impact for some. But it lacked something for me. The story dripping on was OK stylistically as it mirrored Nyma's waiting, but we jumped forward in time relatively quickly and the end petered out too much in my opinion (especially considering that this is a HUGO nominee). Too bad.
You can read the story for free here: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
October 22, 2020
3.5★
“Children were always so resilient. Too resilient.
‘It’s my job now,’ Nyma said into the window, the words fog on the pane.
‘It doesn’t have to be.’”
This is an uncomfortable look at what matters to us and how we make our decisions. The Greater Good, all that. It reminds me of the moral dilemma facing some of our military drone pilots.
It’s short, it’s online, and while it’s not the best short story I’ve read, it is thought-provoking.
It won the 2020 Hugo award for the best short story. The Hugo Awards have been given since 1953 for the best science fiction. http://www.thehugoawards.org/about/
You’ll find the story itself online here:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
“Children were always so resilient. Too resilient.
‘It’s my job now,’ Nyma said into the window, the words fog on the pane.
‘It doesn’t have to be.’”
This is an uncomfortable look at what matters to us and how we make our decisions. The Greater Good, all that. It reminds me of the moral dilemma facing some of our military drone pilots.
It’s short, it’s online, and while it’s not the best short story I’ve read, it is thought-provoking.
It won the 2020 Hugo award for the best short story. The Hugo Awards have been given since 1953 for the best science fiction. http://www.thehugoawards.org/about/
You’ll find the story itself online here:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
November 11, 2021
This is a short story with a haunting ethical dilemma, it will stay with you long after you finish reading.
In 2020, it won a Hugo for Best Short Story was and you can read it for free here
In 2020, it won a Hugo for Best Short Story was and you can read it for free here
April 24, 2020
I was extremely moved by this story but my heart is broken after reading the author’s reason for writing it. When we live in a world where world leaders have access to weapons of mass destruction at the push of a button and drone strikes create terror in the lives of the victims while also giving a dispassionate distance to the perpetrators, this story becomes much more relevant. There are no answers here, only questions - about the consequences of war and whether we make it easy on the leaders who are making life and death decisions for millions. Very profound and well written, if ultimately devastating.
October 27, 2019
“It’s not about right and wrong,” she said to him. “It’s about making it hard.”
August 2, 2020
“An alternate history short story looking at decisions and consequences, and what it takes to pull the trigger.“
I really liked this. What a barbaric idea, although I can see where they are coming from. Not a decision that should be taken lightly and that can be discussed hotly.
Knocking off half a star, because I am somewhat unsatisfied with the abrupt and open ending.
Pretty cover art.
Can be read for free here:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
————
2020 Hugo Award Finalist
Best Short Story
* “And Now His Lordship Is Laughing”, by Shiv Ramdas (Strange Horizons, 9 September 2019)
* “As the Last I May Know”, by S.L. Huang (Tor.com, 23 October 2019) — WINNER BEST SHORT STORY
* “Blood Is Another Word for Hunger”, by Rivers Solomon (Tor.com, 24 July 2019)
* “A Catalog of Storms”, by Fran Wilde (Uncanny Magazine, January/February 2019)
* “Do Not Look Back, My Lion”, by Alix E. Harrow (Beneath Ceaseless Skies, January 2019)
* “Ten Excerpts from an Annotated Bibliography on the Cannibal Women of Ratnabar Island”, by Nibedita Sen (Nightmare Magazine, May 2019)
I really liked this. What a barbaric idea, although I can see where they are coming from. Not a decision that should be taken lightly and that can be discussed hotly.
Knocking off half a star, because I am somewhat unsatisfied with the abrupt and open ending.
Pretty cover art.
Can be read for free here:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
————
2020 Hugo Award Finalist
Best Short Story
* “And Now His Lordship Is Laughing”, by Shiv Ramdas (Strange Horizons, 9 September 2019)
* “As the Last I May Know”, by S.L. Huang (Tor.com, 23 October 2019) — WINNER BEST SHORT STORY
* “Blood Is Another Word for Hunger”, by Rivers Solomon (Tor.com, 24 July 2019)
* “A Catalog of Storms”, by Fran Wilde (Uncanny Magazine, January/February 2019)
* “Do Not Look Back, My Lion”, by Alix E. Harrow (Beneath Ceaseless Skies, January 2019)
* “Ten Excerpts from an Annotated Bibliography on the Cannibal Women of Ratnabar Island”, by Nibedita Sen (Nightmare Magazine, May 2019)
May 15, 2022
As the Last I May Know by S.L. Huang - 4/5★
Nyma is a 10yo girl who is fated to be a companion for the newly elected president, as she bears inside her heart (physically) the codes for some all-obliterating weapons called seres.
Her people, once the only ones the seres were used against, have a great consideration for peace and instituted some time ago this ritual that requires that the person who decides to use the seres (the acting president) must only do so if he/she is capable of murdering a person (in this case, a child, Nyma) with his/her own hands.
Unfortunately, not all people/nations have such qualms against violence and war.
The short story is found in Some of the Best from Tor.com, 2019 edition and can also be read on Tor.com.
Nyma is a 10yo girl who is fated to be a companion for the newly elected president, as she bears inside her heart (physically) the codes for some all-obliterating weapons called seres.
Her people, once the only ones the seres were used against, have a great consideration for peace and instituted some time ago this ritual that requires that the person who decides to use the seres (the acting president) must only do so if he/she is capable of murdering a person (in this case, a child, Nyma) with his/her own hands.
Unfortunately, not all people/nations have such qualms against violence and war.
The short story is found in Some of the Best from Tor.com, 2019 edition and can also be read on Tor.com.
April 22, 2021
Death came to stay with the girl, a secret smile on his lips.
"Your life is a living death as is, I feel quite at home here.
You have given me such a comfy place in your heart.
All the world hates your people - I can see why you hunger for peace."
And then Death sat back, to see what could be bought.
And so the girl thought of the blade, and how it would plunge into her body.
The girl would accept this death, and so unleash the weapons of war.
A new price will be paid!
read all about this new price, for free:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
"Your life is a living death as is, I feel quite at home here.
You have given me such a comfy place in your heart.
All the world hates your people - I can see why you hunger for peace."
And then Death sat back, to see what could be bought.
And so the girl thought of the blade, and how it would plunge into her body.
The girl would accept this death, and so unleash the weapons of war.
A new price will be paid!
read all about this new price, for free:
https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
August 9, 2020
2020 Hugo Award winner - Best short story
Read it here for free: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
Read it here for free: https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
July 16, 2021
One word. Devastating.
পড়া শেষে খানিক স্তব্ধ হয়ে ছিলাম। প্রথম দিকে বুঝতে কষ্ট হচ্ছিলো, পরে এসে আর তা ছিল না। গল্পটা শেষ হওয়ার পর উপলব্ধি হলো আসলেই কতটা ভয়াবহতা ছিল এতটুকুন গল্পে। নিউক্লিয়ার এটাকের কোড নিজের শরীরে বয়ে নিয়ে বেরানো বারো বছর বয়সী নাঈমার পিওভিতে লেখায় গল্পটা অদ্ভুত হাহাকারের সৃষ্টি করেছে। এরপর সময়ে-অসময়ে গল্পের উপজীব্যের স্বার্থকতা নিয়ে ভাবতে বসবো হয়তো।
পড়া শেষে খানিক স্তব্ধ হয়ে ছিলাম। প্রথম দিকে বুঝতে কষ্ট হচ্ছিলো, পরে এসে আর তা ছিল না। গল্পটা শেষ হওয়ার পর উপলব্ধি হলো আসলেই কতটা ভয়াবহতা ছিল এতটুকুন গল্পে। নিউক্লিয়ার এটাকের কোড নিজের শরীরে বয়ে নিয়ে বেরানো বারো বছর বয়সী নাঈমার পিওভিতে লেখায় গল্পটা অদ্ভুত হাহাকারের সৃষ্টি করেছে। এরপর সময়ে-অসময়ে গল্পের উপজীব্যের স্বার্থকতা নিয়ে ভাবতে বসবো হয়তো।
December 12, 2023
“It’s not about right and wrong,” she said to him. “It’s about making it hard.”
A heart-wrenching short story about the horrors of war and the choices we make when we pick death. Disturbing and sad.
A heart-wrenching short story about the horrors of war and the choices we make when we pick death. Disturbing and sad.
January 27, 2020
Full story free at https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
Vaguely reminiscent of The Ones Who Walked Away From Omelas. I recommend that instead.
There's a lot that's beautiful here: the poetry, the concept. It contains good examples of propaganda and politic. I think it could be read by both sides and agreed to be a good book. So why only 2 stars?
Because, in the end, only the child is willing to continue this-- because she, naively, can no longer see outside the walls she's been living in. Because this story glorifies martyrdom and I don't even think the author understands why.
Where are the frightened parents of her home city, eager to kill her themselves to save their own children? Where are the conspiracy theorist citizens weaving narratives that people want to hear-- that she isn't really one of them and can therefore be justifiably killed? How does a story that described propaganda and compassion with such nuance skip these?
This story is not about patriotism or peace. Its about a sad girl who was raised to be a martyr and a tool, is thrown-away during the climax, and does nothing for her country or for herself. This is a treatise in suffering and should not be romanticized.
Vaguely reminiscent of The Ones Who Walked Away From Omelas. I recommend that instead.
There's a lot that's beautiful here: the poetry, the concept. It contains good examples of propaganda and politic. I think it could be read by both sides and agreed to be a good book. So why only 2 stars?
Because, in the end, only the child is willing to continue this-- because she, naively, can no longer see outside the walls she's been living in. Because this story glorifies martyrdom and I don't even think the author understands why.
Where are the frightened parents of her home city, eager to kill her themselves to save their own children? Where are the conspiracy theorist citizens weaving narratives that people want to hear-- that she isn't really one of them and can therefore be justifiably killed? How does a story that described propaganda and compassion with such nuance skip these?
This story is not about patriotism or peace. Its about a sad girl who was raised to be a martyr and a tool, is thrown-away during the climax, and does nothing for her country or for herself. This is a treatise in suffering and should not be romanticized.
August 9, 2020
2020 Hugo Award for best short story. A little simple, perhaps, but the story nevertheless worked on me as intended.
You can read it here https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
You can read it here https://www.tor.com/2019/10/23/as-the...
February 1, 2020
I am very much in the minority since even though I read this twice, I thought it was just okay, nothing special.
August 10, 2020
Hace tan solo unos días se cumplía el aniversario del lanzamiento de las bombas atómicas que arrasaron Hiroshima y Nagasaki. Un hecho histórico trágico que marcó y asoló a toda una generación. Empastando con el artículo de 1981 escrito por el profesor Roger Fisher, donde sugería implantar códigos de lanzamiento en una persona voluntaria, la escritora S. L. Huang escribe una desgarradora historia corta, publicada originalmente en Tor.com, que ha sido galardonada este mismo 2020 con el premio Hugo. No es para menos.
«Como los últimos de mi vida» cuenta la historia de Nyma, una niña de diez años elegida para ser la única que tenga los códigos de acceso a los seres misiles. Eso sí, para acceder a ellos, el presidente debe matarla, ya que dichos códigos residen implantados en una cápsula junto a su corazón. Una artimaña de la Orden, un mecanismo de defensa para que no sea tan fácil matar a miles de personas solo como pulsar un botón. Mientras, la guerra llama a las puertas.
El relato que discurre por un perpetuo dilema moral, acrecentado por la cercanía que van ganando Nyma y el presidente Otto: ¿Vale más una vida que la de miles de personas? ¿Cuál es el coste de lanzar los misiles? Huang se encarga de hacer ver que una masacre mundial no debería ser tan fácil como apretar un botón o dar una orden. Debería tener consecuencias, y solo así, quizás, esos conflictos inhumanos que solo terminan con personas que no tienen nada que ver y vemos día a día, se detendrían. Una desgarradora, angustiosa y desoladora historia, con momentos de pura belleza y compasión, cuya emoción es palpable desde los primeros párrafos.
«Como los últimos de mi vida» cuenta la historia de Nyma, una niña de diez años elegida para ser la única que tenga los códigos de acceso a los seres misiles. Eso sí, para acceder a ellos, el presidente debe matarla, ya que dichos códigos residen implantados en una cápsula junto a su corazón. Una artimaña de la Orden, un mecanismo de defensa para que no sea tan fácil matar a miles de personas solo como pulsar un botón. Mientras, la guerra llama a las puertas.
El relato que discurre por un perpetuo dilema moral, acrecentado por la cercanía que van ganando Nyma y el presidente Otto: ¿Vale más una vida que la de miles de personas? ¿Cuál es el coste de lanzar los misiles? Huang se encarga de hacer ver que una masacre mundial no debería ser tan fácil como apretar un botón o dar una orden. Debería tener consecuencias, y solo así, quizás, esos conflictos inhumanos que solo terminan con personas que no tienen nada que ver y vemos día a día, se detendrían. Una desgarradora, angustiosa y desoladora historia, con momentos de pura belleza y compasión, cuya emoción es palpable desde los primeros párrafos.
July 1, 2020
Short, to the point, and provocative
August 7, 2020
This was an interesting take on Roger Fisher’s proposal. It’s written to make us think because it’s from a little girl point of view and because it summons a whole world where this was proposed, accepted and then a country grew with this decision in its foundations.
It’s a short story and well worth a read. It can be found on here
It’s a short story and well worth a read. It can be found on here
February 12, 2021
“It’s not about right and wrong,” she said to him. “It’s about making it hard.”
That was a really great story. I can see why it won the Hugo Award.
That was a really great story. I can see why it won the Hugo Award.
July 30, 2020
Read for the 2020 Hugos.
This is my favourite of the nominated short stories! A clever and impactful short story about the consequences of war. Packs a serious punch for such a small word count, and I think this one will stick with me for a long time.
This is my favourite of the nominated short stories! A clever and impactful short story about the consequences of war. Packs a serious punch for such a small word count, and I think this one will stick with me for a long time.
September 17, 2020
A story that raises a disturbing question: what would a country do if it had a weapon of mass destruction and wanted to ensure that it would only be use by its President if said President was fully aware of the consequences not just in the abstract but feel the force of the decision by literally having blood on his hands?
Wrapped in this story of an awful dilemma is the story of a girl would is thrust into this moral conflict wholesale. In the end, as time passes and the physical conflict affecting the country becomes ever closer and more desperate, it would turn out to be her, and not the adults, who have to keep up the responsibility of being the one to decide whether access to the weapon should be granted or not.
Wrapped in this story of an awful dilemma is the story of a girl would is thrust into this moral conflict wholesale. In the end, as time passes and the physical conflict affecting the country becomes ever closer and more desperate, it would turn out to be her, and not the adults, who have to keep up the responsibility of being the one to decide whether access to the weapon should be granted or not.
January 12, 2020
This is powerful short fiction. I teared up at least thrice.
Best quote: She gazed out the window and wondered if her death could save them all, or if it would only lead to so many mirrors of herself being massacred, all for the crime of a birth on enemy land.
Best quote: She gazed out the window and wondered if her death could save them all, or if it would only lead to so many mirrors of herself being massacred, all for the crime of a birth on enemy land.
October 25, 2019
Tough decisions all round, but some good character development and world embedding really bring you along for the full ride of war, from children to advisers to leaders.
May 18, 2020
Bounced. Minority opinion, I know. So what?
From another 2-star review: "Unflinchingly brutal and very bleak."
Do I need to read this? No, I do not.
Not for me!
I did like the cover art.
From another 2-star review: "Unflinchingly brutal and very bleak."
Do I need to read this? No, I do not.
Not for me!
I did like the cover art.
November 1, 2020
A powerful Tor short story about how meaningless the death toll numbers are for the people in power, the ones calling the shots in a war. About what it would be like to really put a face to a number when we contemplate the consequences of each decision.
The Twitter thread which explains the inspiration for the story is here and it will make you that much more touched by the writing: https://twitter.com/sl_huang/status/1...
The Twitter thread which explains the inspiration for the story is here and it will make you that much more touched by the writing: https://twitter.com/sl_huang/status/1...
July 25, 2022
Si en vez de pulsar un botón para mandar (seres) misiles, hubiera que matar a alguien que tuviera los códigos en una cápsula cerca del corazón, ¿sería fácil? ¿Y si conocieras a la niña? Y si eres parte de una orden que protege esa idea y tuvieras miedo de la muerte al llegar la guerra, ¿seguirías con el plan?
Sabiendo que se llegó a plantear que los códigos de lanzamientos los tuviera una persona voluntaria, el relato todavía es más potente, ¡por si fuera poco! Y ese final...
Sabiendo que se llegó a plantear que los códigos de lanzamientos los tuviera una persona voluntaria, el relato todavía es más potente, ¡por si fuera poco! Y ese final...
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