I liked this memoir a lot, especially the first half. I enjoyed reading scandalous things about Mary Rodgers’ famous parents (Richard and Dorothy RodgI liked this memoir a lot, especially the first half. I enjoyed reading scandalous things about Mary Rodgers’ famous parents (Richard and Dorothy Rodgers) and their famous friends! I enjoyed reading about her childhood, the milieu she grew up in, her circle of friends (not least of whom was Steven Sondheim), her first disastrous marriage and her second happy one; her most famous works, Once Upon A Mattress and Freaky Friday. Anyway, there is a lot to like in this memoir, not least of which is Mary Rodgers’ wry and witty narrative voice. Her co-writer, Jesse Green, deserves a lot of credit for finishing this memoir after her death and keeping Mary’s distinctive voice consistent and clear throughout the book.
It’s a distinctive voice, and it’s not for everyone. I know some people find Mary’s matter-of-fact recounting of traumatic events to be off-putting. She describes her own childhood as a neglected, abused child very matter-of-factly, with a sprinkling of wry humour that I am sure some people find inappropriate. I remember reading a review where the author seemed really taken aback by Mary’s description of her 3 year old son Matthew’s death from asthma. The implication was that Mary was unmaternal, unfeeling, that she just glossed over his death. But when I actually read the chapter, I didn’t think she glossed over his death and the aftermath at all; instead, I found it to be an unflinching recounting of a tragic death where she was powerless to save her sick child. I could feel Mary’s intense sorrow. She talks about her building terror during his previous attacks, and after describing his eventual death, says, “I was not literally sedated but I felt like a dead planet moving through far space” (p. 332). She talks about how she tried very hard after Matthew’s death not to be like her own narcissistic mother, who made everything about herself; how she felt her first responsibility was to her surviving children, whom she encouraged to grieve in whatever way felt right to them, rather than dictating how they should feel or act. She also says, knowingly, “People seemed, and have seemed ever since, dissatisfied with my grief and my management of my kids’. What can I say? Lose your own chid and see how it feels. For me, grief was too complicated an emotion to have, at least at first. I felt simpler, sharper things, unpredictable stings and slaps, like someone invisible was trying to hurt me” (p. 334). Lots of people wouldn’t be this honest, but I think this is a really good description of one of the myriad, perfectly legitimate ways that people experience grief after loss.
Overall, I’m glad I spent time with Mary. She was obviously a lively, witty person who would be a VERY interesting person to sit next to at dinner. If you are a musical theatre fan, you will probably enjoy this book, and even if you are not but you enjoy memoirs, this is a pretty darn good one....more
I finished this feeling a lot of different things: -sadness for Jill Duggar and her siblings for having been exploited by her parents and the IBLP cultI finished this feeling a lot of different things: -sadness for Jill Duggar and her siblings for having been exploited by her parents and the IBLP cult; -empathy for Jill and her sisters who were molested by her brother Josh and then forced to relive the trauma as their parents supported their molester and not them; -anger and disgust at Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar and Bill Gothard, the creator of the IBLP cult and architect of so much misery; -astonishment at the amount of tax fraud Jim Bob perpetrated and the amount of actual rightful income he denied his children; -admiration for Jill’s bravery in standing up to her parents; -relief that Jill found a husband who actually seems to care a lot more about her than pretty much anyone else in her life up to that point.
Jill’s memoir is still remarkably gentle about her parents, all things considered. I can understand that she must feel conflicted because she does have good memories of them and who would want to feel like your parents were terrible people who didn’t really love you? But the book contained more than a little cognitive dissonance as Jill would describe her father’s monstrous behaviour, her mother’s passive enabling, and then she would try to assure the reader that she knew her parents really did love her and her siblings and were deep down good people. Oh, Jill. Well, at least she’s unwavering in her condemnation of her awful brother Josh, the sister-molesting, child sexual abuse materials-possessing monster. Truly, I am glad that she has shed enough of her patriarchal, victim-blaming upbringing to be firm in the knowledge that his victims did nothing to deserve what he did to them.
I am not religious and the opposite of conservative. I do not doubt that Jill and Derick Dillard and I would disagree on many things. However, one thing I do not disagree with them about is that what happened to Jill was wrong, her parents exploited her and all her siblings, and that it’s a good thing for the Duggar children to start standing up to the whole horrible system that created this opportunity for exploitation. I hope that as Jill and Derick become stronger and more separate from the fundamentalist cult Jill was raised in, they begin to question more and more of the beliefs they have regarding LGBTQ+ people, abortion and reproductive rights, and other things they’ve taken for granted as fundamentalist/evangelical conservative Christians. I guess I’m an optimist.
In the Acknowledgments, Jill thanks her ghost writer, Craig Borlase. I was impressed by the way he was able to put her story into a coherent, ably written narrative that was clear and direct, but also preserved Jill’s voice. That must not have been an easy job, but he did it well and deserves the acknowledgment....more
I kept thinking, oh my god, someone needed to give this poor kid a hug. Elliot Page’s life has been full of abuse and resultant anxiety, so it’s a bitI kept thinking, oh my god, someone needed to give this poor kid a hug. Elliot Page’s life has been full of abuse and resultant anxiety, so it’s a bit harrowing to read about all the things he’s had to deal with over the course of his life. However, it’s also uplifting to read about his journey to transitioning, because *that* part is the happy part of the story.
There are so many narcissistic and abusive people in his life, starting with his father, but Page also mentions many, many generous and caring people. I think there must be something very appealing about him as a person, because just as he’s had lots of users and abusers in his life, he’s also had loyal friends who have stuck with him and helped him get to a better place.
The book’s prose makes it clear that Page is not a professional writer, and the book’s editor seems to have decided that it was better to have his authentic voice come through than to polish his writing to the point that it becomes someone else’s style. I don’t mean this as an insult or a criticism, by the way. Page’s rough but earnestly transparent writing style suits the subject material, which spares no details in a way that sometimes made me feel slightly uncomfortable (this has been somewhat assuaged by learning that Page ensured any ex-lovers mentioned by name were asked for permission to share these stories).
My favourite part was the chapter about the permaculture course Page took while living in the eco-village in Oregon. It just sounded so peaceful and beautifully connected to the land and nature. This is the point (pre-transition) where Page seems the happiest, so it’s a nice part of the book where the reader (and Page!) get a bit of a break from the unrelenting misery that plagues him a lot of the rest of the time.
If you are OK with a non-linear, non-chronological narrative and in-depth discussions of homophobia, transphobia, emotional, sexual, and physical abuse, assault, disordered eating, and self-harm, then this may be a memoir for you. I feel like “enjoyed” is not the appropriate word here, but I am glad I read this book.
PS If anyone doubts the overwhelming level of bigotry and misunderstanding that trans people face, they should read the comments on the (really quite lovely) interview of Page on Seth Meyer’s Late Show. The interview is fantastic, but a significant portion of the comments are appalling. Another Goodreads review mentioned how courageous Page is to share his story, despite the fact that he has more socioeconomic and race privilege than many other trans folks. If someone this well known, white, and wealthy is getting this much hate, what must it be like for people who are poor, unknown, or in some way much more disprivileged?...more
I first became acquainted with David Sedaris in the early 2000s when I read his essays about learning to speak French as an adult (“Me Talk Pretty OneI first became acquainted with David Sedaris in the early 2000s when I read his essays about learning to speak French as an adult (“Me Talk Pretty One Day” and “Jesus Shaves”). Having had my own frustrations as an adult language learner, and having worked as an adult language teacher, I laughed so hard my stomach hurt at his all-t00-accurate descriptions of awkward grammar and inadequate vocabulary.
With a nod to his previous French language classes, Sedaris now tackles learning Japanese in his 50s. This seems an order of magnitude more difficult, and indeed, he says he now appreciates how easy learning French was in comparison.
His Japanese lessons are actually part of a larger set of essays about quitting smoking, which continues a theme that echoes throughout the book, of addiction and mental health, and how hard it is to quit an addiction, whether it is cigarettes or alcohol or seeking the approval of other human beings.
The author narrates the book himself, which is totally appropriate given the style of personal essays. I listened to this on a long drive, and it was an excellent way to pass the time....more
Beautiful and bleak. This book does what the best graphic novels do: transports us to a time and place and immerses us there. Beaton has a lot to say Beautiful and bleak. This book does what the best graphic novels do: transports us to a time and place and immerses us there. Beaton has a lot to say about the psychological, social, and environmental impacts of working in the camps of the Alberta tar sands. I think it is stunning and I’m glad to have read it....more
3.5, rounded up. This was a good book to read at the airport, especially when tired, with shortened attention span, and trying to cope with a flight d3.5, rounded up. This was a good book to read at the airport, especially when tired, with shortened attention span, and trying to cope with a flight delay. It’s a series of essays by blogger Geraldine DeRuiter (the Everywhereist), author of an excellent and pointed essay about cinnamon rolls and sexual harassment and a very funny one about a terrible Michelin starred restaurant.
Mostly, this book is not really about travel. Well, it is, but it’s more about travel as metaphor. If you don’t like that kind of thing and you are looking for a straightforward travel book, this isn’t the right book for you. If you do like that kind of thing, you will probably like it.
DeRuiter has a pleasant, affable writing voice; she is smart, funny, and self-deprecating (sometimes too self-deprecating, I think). She seems to be married to the loveliest man in the world. She has coped admirably with some very difficult things in her life and her descriptions of her extended family and what they mean to her were so touching and relatable for me that I actually teared up at some points. I particularly liked what she had to say about culture and identity as it relates to family relationships and food.
All in all, this is a nice book to read while you are travelling. It’s not overly challenging but it also doesn’t insult your intelligence and it’s good for a gentle chuckle or a nod of recognition. (But really do go to her blog and read that restaurant review. It is hilarious.) ...more
I previewed this book because I was considering using it with one of my academic upgrading classes (the Grade 10 equivalent). After preview, I definitI previewed this book because I was considering using it with one of my academic upgrading classes (the Grade 10 equivalent). After preview, I definitely will use it—if not the whole book, then at least parts of it. This is basically the memoir of Dawn Dumont, an Indigenous woman who grew up on a reserve in Saskatchewan in the 1970s and 1980s. We learn about her and her family, and their relationships with each other, with the other people on the reserve, and with the non-Indigenous people in the surrounding area. A lot of this book is really funny, and at the same time it is poignant. This is less of a novel-like memoir and more like a series of linked stories. My main issue with it is the very abrupt way it ends; I would have liked to know more about what happens to Dawn and her family after she grows up and goes to law school. But perhaps that is another book; this one is mostly about her childhood. She tells hilarious stories about her own foibles and those of her siblings and parents, but also examines the anti-Indigenous racism that permeates her public school experience. Dumont has a strong voice and a good ear for amusing dialogue. ...more
I really enjoyed this. It was perfect heat wave reading: it was a fascinating, well written first person account of a fish out of water scenario.
In 2I really enjoyed this. It was perfect heat wave reading: it was a fascinating, well written first person account of a fish out of water scenario.
In 2007, 19 year old secular university student Kevin Roose decided to undertake a participant observation journalism project—go undercover and become a student at evangelical Christian Liberty University, then write a book. The results are funny, candid, and thought provoking.
I found Roose endearing and likeable, and it was easy to keep reading because I was genuinely interested in how he would interact with whatever new challenge he was presented with. Also, I was really curious as to what the culture would be like on the Liberty University campus. Just how foreign would it be?
It’s not perfect—I would have liked to read more about the experience of women on the LU campus, though with the general degree of separation between men’s and women’s activities at LU, I suppose that would have been difficult for Roose to investigate first hand. Still, he does make friends with some women and we get a quick sketch or two of what life is like for them; I wish he had explored this more in depth.
There is some unquestioned objectification of women and some uncritical reported dialogue with ableist and homophobic slurs that I didn’t love (though Roose is critical of LU’s homophobia).
Overall, I’d recommend this if you like participant observation journalism, or books about undercover work....more
I took a very big break (6 months) in the middle of reading this. Partly it was because I had gotten it from the library and then had to return it befI took a very big break (6 months) in the middle of reading this. Partly it was because I had gotten it from the library and then had to return it before I was finished; partly it was because it was too exhausting to read all at once.
I recall a Goodreads commenter saying that they did not feel comfortable rating memoirs, because they didn't like the idea of critiquing someone's life experiences. I confess I have similar feelings. I know that some readers have expressed skepticism about all the events Lindsay Wong recounts in this memoir, but given that I've met several people who have experienced this kind of childhood abuse...I think "this has to be exaggerated" is something people just tell themselves because it's less disturbing than acknowledging it exists. I mean, sure, perhaps the conversations the author recounts aren't exactly accurate word-for-word, but that doesn't mean they are *untrue*.
I do find it kind of odd that this book was marketed as "darkly comedic," because although there were a couple of places where I laughed, most of it is just horrifying. It's the story of a child who was emotionally and physically abused, and whose family suffered from severe, untreated mental illness. Now, it is definitely a story of resilience: Lindsay Wong eventually emerged from this traumatic childhood, developed self-awareness and an understanding that her childhood was not normal and not her fault. But comedic? Nope. And that's not even taking into account the devastation caused by her own debilitating neurological disorder!
Like the author's family, my mother and her family are ethnically Chinese and immigrated from Asia to Canada (in fact, I grew up near Vancouver, like her, and I also attended UBC). So, there were some cultural aspects of the story I could relate to, like the intense fear of mental illness, the explaining away of extended family members' odd behaviour, and the idea that seeking counselling and psychiatric help is "only for crazy people" and thus to be avoided at all costs (because to be mentally ill was seen as a personal failing). I was also taught a lot of Chinese superstitions and cultural practices, and I can see how it would be confusing if there were also untreated mental illness thrown into the mix. At one point, Lindsay says it was hard for her to tell the difference between genuine Chinese superstitions and the things her family believed because of their mental illnesses.
Although I found the overall story interesting, particularly the last 1/3 which describes Lindsay's struggles with her neurological disorder while in grad school in New York, I was less engaged by the first 2/3 of the book, which I found a bit repetitive. I also think that her writing style is not one I prefer--it is raw, crude, and sharp, which is a legitimate stylistic choice and suits the subject matter, but simply isn't a style I am naturally drawn to.
So, would I recommend it? I don't know. I can see why it was recommended to me, and I am not sorry I read it. I think it is worth checking out, because if it is the kind of story you'll like, you'll like it. But if it is not a book for you, I think you'll be able to tell from reading my review....more
This was one of my favourite books as a child. I was probably ten years old when I first found it in the stacks of the adult nonfiction section of my This was one of my favourite books as a child. I was probably ten years old when I first found it in the stacks of the adult nonfiction section of my public library, and I have probably read it at least 20 times, along with its sequels. The book begins with the young Durrell and his family sitting gloomily inside, trapped by the English rain, when they decide to move to sunny Greece to join older brother Larry and his wife in Corfu. (Imagine my surprise later as an English major when I realized Larry was actually acclaimed author Lawrence Durrell.)
I remember Durrell’s narrative as gentle and humorous, but also sharply observant and quite droll. I plan to reread this and I hope it stands up to my memories of it....more
Thanks to publisher Iron Circus for an advance reader copy of this book (via Edelweiss+) in exchange for an honest review. This review also appears onThanks to publisher Iron Circus for an advance reader copy of this book (via Edelweiss+) in exchange for an honest review. This review also appears on Edelweiss+ and my blog.
I enjoyed this book. I don’t know a lot about Korean history, particularly recent history, and this was a great intro to the repression that happened in the 1980s. I’ve seen some interesting Korean films recently that have political commentary complementary to the themes in this novel, and reading Banned Book Club actually gives me more context for those films.
Set in South Korea in the early 1980s, the book is about Hyun Sook, a young woman who, against her mother’s opposition, goes to university to take English literature. While there, she discovers that there is more going on beneath the surface of Korean politics than she thought, and she becomes friends with a group of student activists through their secret banned book club.
What makes the novel even more interesting is that it’s a well illustrated graphic memoir based on the author’s experiences as a university student. It’s not quite as polished or literary as, say, Satrapi’s Persepolis, but it’s pretty impressive overall. It was a fast, interesting, high quality read with a likeable protagonist, and I’m glad to have learned more about this period in Korean history....more
The first David Sedaris book I read was Me Talk Pretty One Day. At the time, I was a language teacher, so his descriptions of trying to learn French hThe first David Sedaris book I read was Me Talk Pretty One Day. At the time, I was a language teacher, so his descriptions of trying to learn French had me weeping with laughter. His essay about his brother, “Can’t Kill the Rooster,” remains one of the funniest things I’ve read.
Calypso is not like his other books. Yes, there are parts that made me laugh out loud, but I don’t think that’s its main purpose. I think with Calypso, Sedaris is working out his feelings about the death of his alcoholic mother, the death by suicide of his sister Tiffany, his father’s increasing age and frailty, his own mortality, and—this is important—his own awareness that he is not always a nice person or good to his fellow human beings.
This may not be his funniest book, but I found parts of it very moving and some of his reflections on death, aging, and grief to be quite profound....more
So very difficult to read, but I’m glad I read it. This is a story of incredible abuse, dysfunction and, ultimately, survival. It’s beautifully writteSo very difficult to read, but I’m glad I read it. This is a story of incredible abuse, dysfunction and, ultimately, survival. It’s beautifully written, as gripping as a novel, and even more moving because it is someone’s actual life. ...more
I was talking about this book recently as one of those memoirs I read when I was a kid (at what was undoubtedly a totally inappropriate age) that has I was talking about this book recently as one of those memoirs I read when I was a kid (at what was undoubtedly a totally inappropriate age) that has probably not aged well at all. I can't imagine the sexual or gender politics bear the remotest resemblance to my current feminist sensibilities.
I can't give this book a star rating because I don't remember details, but boy did I enjoy reading it at the time. I remember finding it absolutely fascinating and hilarious. I still enjoy reading books by people who describe the day to day details of their jobs that outsiders would not know, but I think I'll pass on re-reading this one since its dated attitudes towards gender, race, and sexual orientation would likely give me an aneurysm. ...more
Mildly entertaining and nicely suitable for listening to while walking the dog. The best part is hearing the late Carrie Fisher reading it to you in hMildly entertaining and nicely suitable for listening to while walking the dog. The best part is hearing the late Carrie Fisher reading it to you in her raspy, perpetually amused voice. Her tone is pretty much “Can you *believe* all the crazy things that have happened in my life?!” I read her novel Postcards From the Edge when I was a teenager and thought it was hilarious, so it was fun hearing about the real life people PFTE was based on. I enjoyed the gently gossipy stories about her parents and their Hollywood friends (and her ex-husbands), and I really liked how fond she obviously is of her daughter and mother. Overall, it was not earth shattering literature, but it kept me interested and was a good length—only three hours or so. And it was nice to spend a little more time with Carrie Fisher, whose final performance in the last Star Wars movie reminded me of how delightful she could be. ...more
This book is beautiful, and I'm very glad to have read it. It is especially relevant right now, this tale of a refugee and her family and the complicaThis book is beautiful, and I'm very glad to have read it. It is especially relevant right now, this tale of a refugee and her family and the complications of leaving one's home under duress and making a new home in a strange land. It's not a traditional narrative with a beginning middle and end, more a series of vignettes, a non chronological selection of the narrator's memories. It's not only well written by Kim Thuy but also well translated--Sheila Fischman is truly one of the best....more
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