(I was given a copy of this book via tumblr in exchange for an honest review.)
Our Bloody Pearl hooked me from pretty much the first paragraph. I loved(I was given a copy of this book via tumblr in exchange for an honest review.)
Our Bloody Pearl hooked me from pretty much the first paragraph. I loved it, and I'm excited to see Bryn's future works!
IMO the strongest aspect of this book was the main character. Perle's narrative voice was fresh and unique; they were distinct within sentences and I was attached within pages. The other characters proved similarly lovable - OBP has a really solid cast with a strong dynamic. (The cast was also entirely LGBT and didn't struggle for it, which always warms my heart, and as a nonbinary person, seeing a main character who uses they/them pronouns made me !!!) Bryn also has a wonderful narrative style; the lines of poetry at the start of each chapter were gorgeous, and so was the prose. I finished the book a few weeks ago, but a lot of the scenes still stick out clearly in my mind, and I have a vivid memory of both the imagery the prose created and the emotions carried in the scene.
The worldbuilding did feel fresh as well - I love pirate stories and the steampunk aspects involved were really well integrated, and of course the exploration of the siren species was wonderful and dragged me in at once. That being said, though, this was definitely a story driven by and focused on characters, which is where the book's worst (and perhaps only noticeable) flaw comes through: the development of the villain. Kian was a strong presence at the beginning of the book, in Perle's memories and constant fear of her, but she seemed to remain that way, only growing into a full character at the end of the story.
That said, though, I wholeheartedly enjoyed this novel and will definitely be buying a paperback copy!...more
i'm a visibly gay and trans person. these days i introduce myself with my pronouns to most of the people i meet. i haven't had to "come out," in the ti'm a visibly gay and trans person. these days i introduce myself with my pronouns to most of the people i meet. i haven't had to "come out," in the traditional sense, in over a year. this book brings back the exact feeling that i've almost forgotten, and it does it perfectly. like. it is CRYSTAL clear that becky albertalli worked with LGBT kids, just from the amount of empathy her narration shows us. simon coming out to people and then, instead of feeling comforted, feeling unsettled and anxious and like he's crossed a line... bram coming out to his mother and then feeling so jittery he can't sleep... the sense of surreality it all carries... martin, a straight kid, saying he "didn't realize people still did stuff like that" when confronted with homophobia... (AND the added bonus of the scene in the gay bar being handled perfectly, with the college boy immediately guiding simon back to his friends when he realizes simon is underage/too young for him... "go be seventeen...") this book really does Get It in a way books written by cishet people RARELY, rarely do.
also it just makes me smile unbelievably. i read the last ~30 pages with a huge grin on my face. becky albertalli can have little a writing about gay people, as a treat.
2023 edit: i did not know when i wrote this that becky albertalli was closeted and i would write it differently now that i have more perspective on this. but everything else i said stands...more
i vividly remember reading this book as a middle schooler, sitting in the establishment where my mom got her hair cut, waiting for her and eating gummi vividly remember reading this book as a middle schooler, sitting in the establishment where my mom got her hair cut, waiting for her and eating gummy oranges and learning what drag queens were. this is kind of the most i remembered before rereading. and the thing is that i'm not much for YA novels anymore; i mostly like long convoluted stories about terrible people, and YA novels are (reasonably!) often not that. but holy shit, am i glad i came back to this one. what a stunning accomplishment of a coming-of-age story--and it's not like the pressure was off, either; this has been dubbed the "first south-asian american YA novel;" it was written in 2002; this was a big deal.
and deservedly so! this book is 500 pages and--i will be frank--sometimes drags. but those 500 pages also give such a vivid, beautiful, hilarious picture of dimple lala, who is one of those characters i feel like i could call up and talk to. tanuja desai hidier's prose purples sometimes, but most of the time it's unbelievably lush and fresh for a contemporary; i love how she puts words together. maybe the reason this book works so well for me at twenty-one is because it's so much longer and denser and more complex than most YA novels; it bursts with too-muchness. (also, perhaps, because the characters are in high school but not in high school, as it's summer vacation. idgaf about high school anymore so this was a W for me). 4 stars because of the aforementioned dragging and the sometimes-overwrought prose, but this book is dope as hell
assorted notes:
- shockingly undated for a book that came out in 2002! all of the LGBT characters (no spoilers) are given a great deal of depth and understanding and serve as more than just fodder for dimple's story (a big part of dimple's story is recognizing the complexity of (view spoiler)[kavita, her indian-born-and-raised cousin, a lesbian (hide spoiler)] as more than just a foil to dimple's life. i am not gonna lie: there is at least one transmisogynistic line in here (dimple thinking of the hijras she's met as looming and creepy and tackily-dressed is, uh. a moment for sure). but the major hijra/drag queen character (the two terms used for her; i'm using she/her here because that's what she gets most of the time) herself, (view spoiler)[zara (hide spoiler)], is portrayed explicitly as gorgeous and intelligent and worthy of respect. the beauty of the photoshoot scene, and the image of her running across the field with her shoes and silks sliding off, has stuck with me since i was twelve.
- i am not the person to comment on the way this book handles culture and assimilation, but desai hidier is clearly trying to encapsulate the vast number of perspectives on what it means to be south-asian-american and what's best for the community--cultural outreach? cultural defensiveness? how do tradition and innovation mix? is it possible to be "indian enough," or "american enough?" arguably, one could read a SJW stereotype into the stick-up-her-ass lesbian leftist, who i think is the only character to outright discuss colonialism, but as much as i don't love that, i think it could be worse. it's not sabina's ideas mocked so much as her conviction that she's right about everything, when so much of this book is about the fact that there IS no right way to be desi (or gay, or alive).
- i want to bite gwyn. not in a sexy way. i am aware i may be reading my own life a bit too hard into "friend who constantly neglects and steamrolls over her so-called bestie and then acts like they're equally at fault," and i think desai hidier does a fantastic job of making gwyn understandable and sympathetic and very, very human, as all of these characters are. i also still think she owes dimple about five to ten more apologies. you can't be saying all that white baby
- i love a book that's like "your parents are indeed people who are just as flawed and confused as you are and also they had lives before you," and i think part of the reason this book succeeds so well is because dimple's parents are never one-dimensionally either Evil Tyrannical Nags or Perfect Telepathic Paragons of Parenting, nor are they one-dimensionally either "traditionally indian" or fully assimilated. the way that scene between dimple and her dad almost had me bawling at work. fuck offfffff
- can't believe this had me shipping a straight couple. karsh is maybe a little too perfect, but then again, we're in dimple's POV; the glasses are rose-colored. and he's charming! it's a very realistically awkward, emotionally-muddled teen romance, and desai hidier pulls off the difficult task of making (most of) the miscommunication understandable on a character level rather than a clear plot contrivance.
- the fact that this book (almost) ends in a bollywood dance is so great. outsold...more
the question of whether adult YA authors should write about teens having sex is... complicated. (he said, stating the obvious.) but genuinely, it's cothe question of whether adult YA authors should write about teens having sex is... complicated. (he said, stating the obvious.) but genuinely, it's complicated enough that i'm not sure how i feel about it. on the one hand, adults writing about underage characters having sex definitely doesn't FEEL like a great idea. but on the other hand, modern day teenagers (in america, at least) are so saturated in sexuality all the time, coming at them from everywhere, that having books that specifically intend to answer questions about safe sex and relieve teens' shame about sex... well, in my opinion, it's not a terrible addition to that saturation. that's mostly what i expected from this book -- discussions of safe sex & pushback against the way gay men specifically are treated as inherently & overtly too sexual.
and i got that. what i wasn't expecting was the legitimately really good commentary on 1) the fetishization of gay men and 2) the idea of the "good gay." i'm giving this four stars instead of five because it just never really hit that extra five-star point for me (plus it wrapped up rather quickly imo, plus they kept calling les mis "les miz" which, no, isn't important but i'm petty and it drove me insane) -- i liked it, but i didn't love it. but it IS just a seriously good book that has, like its main character, a lot to say that definitely needs to be said....more
this is an intimidating review to write, because this book has literally ten reviews on this website and i feel like that gives my opinion some weightthis is an intimidating review to write, because this book has literally ten reviews on this website and i feel like that gives my opinion some weight. i am honestly shocked by that number; i have my critiques, but this book should absolutely be read and beloved by many many more people, and if you’re at all interested in “what if stone butch blues, but somewhat less bleak and a lot more intertwined with jewishness,” you should 100% give it a try.
so i'll start with the things i loved about this! first of all, obviously: gender! i really love not just the exploration of ida’s gender, but also the fact that at no point does zeller cave to making it fit modern ideas of transness. ida describes herself as feeling like she should have been a man, and sometimes like she is a man, but at the same time, she doesn’t want to call herself a he or give up the name her father gave her. she refers to herself as she, but she wishes there were a third option (ida please come to 2023 i need to introduce you to they/them and neopronouns please please hello please). she seeks no medical transition, but often does the equivalent of going stealth as a man. i really love reading trans characters’ perceptions of their own gender, especially in times and places other than my own, and it’s beautifully done here. and there’s also a BUTCH CHARACTER!!! self-described as such! clem i love you <3
also, hats! hats as a way for people to connect with one another! hats sometimes literally as people—the moment of ida's birth is conflated with the birth of a hat, described in those terms. hats sometimes as genders, too—ida's pith helmet definitely is, and ida's mother calls ida's father a hat in a moment i swear is a degendering. i am definitely going to think about hats differently after this book. especially because most of the time, when it's about hats, it's really about bodies: bodies and how they interact with each other and how you dress them up and how they fail you and how you can become separated from them.
unfortunately, the hats decrease after part one, and so does some of the intimacy. the first part chronicles ida's childhood in detail, but then the book starts to get... skimmier. and i get why, on both counts: personally-crafted hats are falling increasingly out of fashion as the book leaves the 1930s, and ida's adult life involves a lot of timeskips. but when we're given her childhood in so much detail, there's stuff in her adulthood i'm disappointed not to see, like ida's first time with a woman, or (view spoiler)[her feelings about becoming a parent (hide spoiler)].
overall, there's an aimlessness to the book. there's no real plot; it's more of an epic journey through ida's life (and the lives of some of her ancestors). and i love plotless books, so i'm all for that! and i get why ida's usually stagnating instead of growing—that's ida's entire problem. but at some point, in a 460-page book, i find myself wanting at least some throughline, some kind of growth, instead of just drifting around. the ending reminded me of casey plett's little fish, in that it felt real but not satisfying. conclusivity is hard to come by in real life. especially when you're trans. oftentimes the closure never comes. still, the end didn't feel like an end, just a stop.
still, i enjoyed it a lot. a lot of people in the reviews comment on the wrenching sadness of this book. which might make one wonder why i described it as less bleak than stone butch blues. well, that’s because stone butch blues is dedicated to unrelentingly kicking you in the ribs every other page, and this book isn’t. it is really sad, though. holy shit, that part in the middle surrounding (view spoiler)[eve (hide spoiler)]. but it isn’t gratuitously sad; it can be hard to read at times, because it’s clear ida is mired in pain, or in a numbness that protects her from the pain. but there are glimmers of hope. there is so much love between these pages. and zeller has a delightfully wry narrative voice that keeps things from getting too grim. (also, i will admit i will always defend a trans book from charges of being Too Sad. especially historical fiction. sometimes shit was sad as hell! sensationalism is bad, but writing realistically difficult stuff about grief and pain and antisemitism and transphobia isn’t!)
i also ought to note, at least once, that there are some basic issues here typical of books published by small indie presses—some easily fixable typos, some easily fixable indentation issues, the fact that none of the text was justified. it's a testament to this book's power that none of those things really bothered me. despite my critiques, i found book of hats an incredibly successful endeavor, and one that's going to stay with me. i'll say it again: i am shocked that this book has only—well, eleven reviews, now. come on, guys. get on this with me. we can still bring the book of hats renaissance about in 2024.
not sure what to say about this. um, first of all: wow.
on the one hand, i want to recommend this to e[cw in this review for discussion of transphobia]
not sure what to say about this. um, first of all: wow.
on the one hand, i want to recommend this to every trans person i know. it's such a fundamentally honest story, nothing hollywoodified, nothing held back. the writing is both bare and evocative--not ornamental, but vivid--and wendy's character in particular feels so detailed and layered. casey plett is a good fucking writer, and this is a beautiful book.
on the other hand, it is a book that reminds you, constantly and deliberately, how little our world cares about trans women. about all trans people, yeah, but specifically about trans women, who are hypervisible and hypervulnerable and the target of so much specific and insidious and murderous hate. when i say murderous, i don’t mean (only) that trans women are literally murdered; i mean that the oppression of transmisogyny is a slow killer. the characters in this book deal with addiction, health problems, loneliness, eviction, shitty experiences with sex work, sexual assault, suicide. to say all of this sprouts from hatred is wrong, maybe, because some of it isn’t hatred; some of it is just a cold indifference. there’s a specific scene in this book that isn’t nearly the worst thing that happens, on an objective level, but hit me hardest emotionally because it drove home that people outside wendy’s circle just… did not want to help her. did not see her as someone to be helped or cared for.
this sounds ridiculously bleak, but i also ought to point out that there is a tight-knit community of trans women at the center of this book, shown over and over supporting and loving one another. i wouldn't call this a hopeless book. i would call it bleakly honest, but i think to pigeonhole plett into writing a book about How Trans People Have It Hard is, largely, to miss the point. yes, this is a book that is at times miserable, but it's not misery porn. a lot of the negative reviews center on how depressing this book is, and yeah, it is. i get it! lots of trans people don't want to read 300 pages of a trans woman having the shittiest parts of life thrown at her over and over! but i also think we should be careful not to discourage trans writers from exploring the darker sides of trans life. there are also people in the reviews talking about how this book struck a chord with them as transfemmes. if you can handle the heavy content warnings, this is a book worth reading.
what else to say? well, it was really hard to put down, despite being relatively plotless. this is a slice-of-life novel about exploring wendy's life during two months of a specifically rough winter. and i think that plotlessness is fine, but it does relate to the two main criticisms i have. first, that i wish there had been slightly more focus on wendy's grandfather. "was wendy's grandpa trans?" is the selling point in the blurb, and her relationship with her family and her religion (said family is entirely mennonite) was the most interesting part of the story to me; i'd have loved to see more exploration. second: i'm of two minds about the ending. it didn’t feel like things resolved so much as just… stopped. and part of me likes that, because real life never all resolves at once; things happen and continue to happen, over and over. but as a reader, i wanted a stronger sense of closure, even if that final image made me feel a deep and powerful ache (said positively).
that said, those criticisms didn't stop me from nearly crying multiple times. that final anna wendy conversation. jesus christ. i need to read more casey plett
you should read this book if you enjoy: character-driven stories! complex and sometimes-shitty pov characters! stories about grief and loneliness! and, of course, transgender people! [trigger warnings: transphobia/transmisogyny, suicide, alcohol abuse, sexual assault]...more
4 stars for content, 3 stars for enjoyment. look, this book made POINTS. there is next to nothing* here that i disagree with. davis's overarching poin4 stars for content, 3 stars for enjoyment. look, this book made POINTS. there is next to nothing* here that i disagree with. davis's overarching point is that the vast majority of sex categorizations (such as having to click M or F on college applications, or having sex markers on public transport passes) are completely unnecessary and lend themselves to acts of transphobia--rather than trying to make it easier for trans people to get their sex markers changed, we ought to try to take away sex markers altogether, except in situations where they are distinctly necessary (and of course, even in medical settings, "people with uteruses" or "people with high levels of testosterone" might be more relevant labels than a blanket "male" or "female," etc etc etc). i agree with this completely, and i think this book is full of excellent research on the topic, and generally i agree with everything davis is saying! that said, the writing itself tended to get repetitive; there were a few places where paragraphs seemed almost literally copy-pasted from other sections. + i think davis takes for granted that his audience is up-to-date on trans politics, and, like, yeah, i am, but i'm not sure how this book would hold up to people who aren't as far left as i am. there are also places (such as the issue of male versus female "socialization") where i wish issue discussion went deeper--again, davis seems to take his audience for granted.
that said, i'm still rating this four stars because... he said what he said and he was fucking correct. recommended if you're interested in the issue, as it's a great jumping-off point to research & discussion about this sort of thing!
*i'm not sure how i feel about the idea of turning womens'-only colleges to "historically womens' colleges"--i do think it's rational that women might want a space without their oppressors, but then, maybe a college shouldn't be that place, especially since transgender students (trans women especially) so often get the short end of the stick in application cases there. idk this is something to which i need to devote more thought...more
this book has next to nothing to do with the winter's tale but god it is so fucking good. i understand and to some degree agree with reviews that say this book has next to nothing to do with the winter's tale but god it is so fucking good. i understand and to some degree agree with reviews that say it could have delved deeper into hermione's emotions and experiences post-assault (it does often seem that everyone around her handles things unrealistically perfectly), but i also think on some level that's not what this book is trying to do--it's a story of trauma that is fiercely optimistic all the way through. and god does it slap...more
this book REEKS of Written By Cishet Man and the opening framing is also WAY too long (not quite wuthering-heights level but close); that said, the cothis book REEKS of Written By Cishet Man and the opening framing is also WAY too long (not quite wuthering-heights level but close); that said, the concepts are intensely cool so maybe i'll read the second book, like, someday...more
The start was a little slow, but about a quarter of the way through it picked up and then I couldn't put it down. WoThis book said nonbinary RIGHTS...
The start was a little slow, but about a quarter of the way through it picked up and then I couldn't put it down. Wonderful characters (including the main character, who had a fantastic narrative voice) and weird in a really, really great way, but the thing that stood out most to me was that this was SUPER cathartic to read as a nb person, especially as a nb lesbian. I felt deeply connected to Kivali in a way that I haven't felt connected to even other LGBT characters in fiction and this book felt like something special and personal. Definitely one of my favorite recent reads :3c...more
was the ending of this book a little rushed? were some loose ends left untied? yes. did i grin through the last 10-20 pages like an idiot and make smawas the ending of this book a little rushed? were some loose ends left untied? yes. did i grin through the last 10-20 pages like an idiot and make small delighted noises to myself? also yes i am a homosexual -...more
He wanted to give her every light that had ever hung in the night sky. He wanted to give her back what she thought
(8/28 off the 2022-specific TBR)
He wanted to give her every light that had ever hung in the night sky. He wanted to give her back what she thought she'd lost years ago.
irl bestie has been urging me to read mclemore for years and he was right. he was right! i have no defense; he was right and i should have done it earlier. this is a beautiful book filled with lush prose and fantastical magical realism, and i love transgender people. some thoughts:
>the prose in this book is very vivid and descriptive; it creates a wonderful atmosphere, and there are so many lines i had to jot down to hold onto. if you like prose that is almost purple but not so much that it's annoying, read this book. i will admit it: sometimes it is... too descriptive. there are definitely some uses of figurative language that felt like Too Much. but overall i didn't feel like i was wading through the prose, just that it was a little too ornamental at points.
>this isn't a book with heavy and detailed worldbuilding; it's not fantasy so much as speculative magical realism. yes, magic happens, but it's not about the rules, it's about the vibes. i love magical realism and i loved the magic in this book--especially as it's often tied to emotion & the differences between miel's magic versus aracely's versus the bonner girls'--but if you're here for concrete worldbuilding, pick another book.
>this is not a plot-based book. this is a book based on atmosphere and character. and because of that, i particularly appreciate the depth mclemore lends to every character, even the bonner girls, who could have very easily (as conventionally attractive antagonist girls) been pigeonholed into some kind of regina george model. but each bonner girl is given her own trials and traits, and the story treats them with empathy even while they act as antagonists. also, sam. sam sam sam sam sam. sam my beloved. there are sooooo many lines in this book that made me want to clutch at my hair. mclemore's author's note says a lot of sam's experiences with gender are inspired by their real-life husband's transition, and that lends the trans representation a degree of authenticity that made it both painful and cathartic to read.
It was the name of a girl who had not died because she had never quite lived. She had never truly existed. She was a life that did not belong to Sam but that he'd tried to belong to. ... He wanted to neither forget she existed nor live inside her.
(rep: both main characters are characters of color [miel is latina, sam pakistani]; sam is a trans guy; one of the side characters is a lesbian; one of the side characters is a trans woman.)
>i also appreciate how this book deals with teenagers and sex--no spoilers, but teenage sex happens and it's treated totally normally. it's given emotional weight for and by the characters, but it's also not something scandalous or horrible or cataclysmic for the plot. it's just a thing that happens. which is how it is in real life also, so.
>aracely. send post. i love her a lot. when (view spoiler)[older siblings. and trans people (hide spoiler)] send tweet
tl;dr: good book. gorgeous book. highly recommended if you like vibe-based magic, quiet stories about love and power, and/or transgender people hell yeah...more
so i actually make a habit of avoiding thoughts of my own mortality, less because i don't want to grow as a person or whatever and more because it makso i actually make a habit of avoiding thoughts of my own mortality, less because i don't want to grow as a person or whatever and more because it makes the anxiety disorder get debilitating and i've got to act like a normal person, for god's sake. so if i kept myself at an arm's length for the first 75% of this book - far enough from the emotion to note some analytical flaws, like the way the romance seems to come out of nowhere, or the tendency for characters to repeatedly make perfectly composed but profound and emotional speeches like the one guy in the fault in our stars - that's partially on me. but the last 25%... got me. it got me! it did get me. god damn did the end of this book hurt. (view spoiler)[ the way matteo and rufus firmly reject the idea that they're star-crossed lovers. the resonance of "we're not dying because of love" for two latino boys loving each other. "i would've loved you if we had more time." the VERY last chapter and the ending that's both very clear about its implications but also not the most painful note the book could have ended on at all... man. MAN. (hide spoiler)]
also, i read... the whole latter half of this book in one sitting? so if i'm leveling any complaints it's from unstable ground, to fully mix my metaphors....more
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