Lindsey Marxreiter

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T. Gephart
“Make it stop. Make it stop. Expelliarmus. Expelliarmus Goddamn it!”
T. Gephart, #1 Crush

Ali Hazelwood
“carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man”
Ali Hazelwood, The Love Hypothesis

Lauren Layne
“All right. We can handle this,” Ian said. “We’ll do it randomly. Coin toss.”
“That works,” Matt said. “You got a coin?”
“No. Get one out of your desk.”
“You think I keep coins in my desk?” Matt asked incredulously. “Do I also go to the saloon and get weirdly possessive of my horse?” “Whatever. Kennedy?”
“I literally can’t remember the last time I touched a coin.”
Lauren Layne, Huge Deal

Darynda Jones
“I was just wondering, is Reye's...you know, package, is that an accurate representation of what a guy has?"
I couldn't help it. I referred back to one of my favorite movies, The Jerk, "Um, do you mean his special purpose?"
"No, I mean his cock.”
Darynda Jones, Seventh Grave and No Body

Meghan Quinn
“Jason, it’s a pleasure.” Instead of being in awe or “fangirling” over one of the best catchers in the country, my dad acts normal and doesn’t even mention the fact that Jason is a major league baseball player. “Going up north with my daughter?”

“Yes, sir.” Jason sticks his hands in his back pockets and all I can focus on is the way his pecs press against the soft fabric of his shirt. “A-plus driver here in case you were wondering. No tickets, I enjoy a comfortable position of ten and two on the steering wheel, and I already established the rule in the car that it’s my playlist we’re listening to so there’s no fighting over music. Also, since it’s my off season, I took a siesta earlier today so I was fresh and alive for the drive tonight. I packed snacks, the tank is full, and there is water in reusable water bottles in the center console for each of us. Oh, and gum, in case I need something to chew if this one falls asleep.” He thumbs toward me. “I know how to use my fists if a bear comes near us, but I’m also not an idiot and know if it’s brown, hit the ground, if it’s black, fight that bastard back.” Oh my God, why is he so adorable? “I plan on teaching your daughter how to cook a proper meal this weekend, something she can make for you and your wife when you’re in town.”

“Now this I like.” My dad chuckles. Chuckles. At Jason. I think I’m in an alternate universe.

“I saw this great place that serves apparently the best pancakes in Illinois, so Sunday morning, I’d like to go there. I’d also like to hike, and when it comes to the sleeping arrangements, I was informed there are two bedrooms, and I plan on using one of them alone. No worries there.”

Oh, I’m worried . . . that he plans on using the other one.

“Well, looks like you’ve covered everything. This is a solid gentleman, Dottie.”

I know. I really know.

“Are you good? Am I allowed to leave now?”

“I don’t know.” My dad scratches the side of his jaw. “Just from how charismatic this man is and his plans, I’m thinking I should take your place instead.”

“I’m up for a bro weekend,” Jason says, his banter and decorum so easy. No wonder he’s loved so much. “Then I wouldn’t have to see the deep eye-roll your daughter gives me on a constant basis.”

My dad leans in and says, “She gets that from me, but I will say this, I can’t possibly see myself eye-rolling with you. Do you have extra clothes packed for me?”

“Do you mind sharing underwear with another man? Because I’m game.”

My dad’s head falls back as he laughs. “I’ve never rubbed another man’s underwear on my junk, but never say never.”

“Ohhh-kay, you two are done.” I reach up and press a kiss to my dad’s cheek. “We are leaving.” I take Jason by the arm and direct him back to the car. From over his shoulder, he mouths to my dad to call him, which my dad replies with a thumbs up.

Ridiculous. Hilarious.

When we’re saddled up in the car, I let out a long breath and shift my head to the side so I can look at him. Sincerely I say, “Sorry about that.”

With the biggest smile on his face, his hand lands on my thigh. He gives it a good squeeze and says, “Don’t apologize, that was fucking awesome.”
Meghan Quinn, The Lineup

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