kaylina's Reviews > The Awakening

"There isn't anyone else, sunshine. Only you."

you know how like there’s always that one book that has everything you’ve been looking for in a story, even if you weren’t consciously aware of it? it just feels like it’s for you, like you’re the perfect target audience for the book and every page that you read, the story gets better and better as if the author knows the exact spots that will hit you deeply?

i don’t think i have enough emotional capacity to explain how much this book fits that perfectly for me.

my journey with this series was a brief one due to how quickly i tore through all three books, but it’s surely become quite memorable due to the fact that this book is most certainly going to be on my “favorite reads of 2022” list. it hit all the right spots for me, not just as a reader who has my own preferences and all when it comes to fiction, but simply as someone who enjoys reading because of how many characters i’ve met who i could feel connected to. and in this one, jae & junichi are absolutely everything to me, no question.

i’ll always be thankful towards the author for that first book with haruka & nino because i had read it at the most perfect time, and these characters felt so warm & familiar it was hard not to want to hide myself in the pages as a source of comfort. that emotional attachment i built was quite a big one and it helped tide me through the second book as there were certain parts in the vanishing that was just not as satisfying as i may have hoped for. it was still amazing, but out of the three books, the second one felt a bit faded. then this came out a couple months after, jae & junichi’s story, and just…wow. i thought my feelings were strong enough about the first book, and it definitely stems from the fact of how comforting it was for me to read it, but this one? this one is absolutely brilliant in every single way.

jae & junichi’s characters didn’t just provide me some comfort or give me a sort of escape, they were quite literally the best example of how strong this author’s writing has clearly become over time as they were writing these books and i love that for them so much. it isn’t just about how compelling this world of vampires was, that allure that drew me in to this series in the first place, it was about how vast & truly diverse this group of characters were and how deeply their bonds move the reader in an incredible way. the author has always done an amazing job from the beginning with exploring these characters’ backgrounds, not simply labeling them according to their respective heritages/traits but actually delving into what makes them them, along with all the little things that piece them together throughout each of their stories. i was blown away with the japanese representation, especially as this series is set majorly in japan, but then there was the dominican representation here in the awakening…it wasn’t there just to be there, like it felt so real and it made me connect to junichi in a way i didn’t expect.

i became so enamored me with his & jae’s relationship as they took the time to get to know each other and deal with their own respective “baggage”, as they themselves claim. the development of their bond was so incredibly moving, it touched me straight through the heart, and it genuinely did feel like something human the way that the author wrestled with their fears and showed the dark parts of a vampire aristocracy and how far it can push you away from it. in the case for both of these characters, this story provides so much depth as to just how significant it is to live in a time where humans & vampires live alongside each other and how they both affect each other. jae himself is a character who you only meet briefly in the second book and yet you feel like you got a good impression of him, only to realize just how much there’s yet to know about him, things he didn’t even know about himself.

seeing the author take his & junichi’s journey so slow and with such careful hands made the emotional impact hit that much harder, and it did almost make me cry, i have to say. they both have experienced and still experience trauma connected to the vampire community that created this divide so hard to ignore as the story moves along, and to see how they grapple with it and try to keep themselves afloat felt harrowing and i was in it every step of the way. the decision to have this book in first-person dual pov was yet another creative choice on the author’s part that at first, i was really wary of but it quickly became probably one of the most genius things that came out of this entire book. i don’t know how to explain it well, only that first-person obviously is much more personal, and it gives a deeper exploration of how chaotic a character’s feelings can get as they experience turmoil in their own story. here, it was so clear how taken jae & junichi were with each other but outside of that, being in their respective first-person pov’s offered a more sharp picture that reflected their personal fears & desires.

both characters felt so distinct, i enjoyed every minute of their perspectives—jae with his passion for healing those in the vampire community; even as self-sufficient as they might seem, his kind & ambitious heart pushes for there to be a much wider scope of care to give to those who are in need of it. as for junichi, having small insights into his career in fashion was an absolute delight. the amount of detail paid attention to the styles of all these characters in this book was phenomenal, an extension of each individual as they battle with internal forces. junichi wears such bright and daring clothing, but hides himself away from building any sort of intimate connection with a ranked vampire due to his traumatic past. jae, at least near the beginning, wears mute colors that seem to have him fade in the background as if to pass off as just some ordinary human, but whenever he’s with junichi, his charm and personality practically exude with pure confidence, it was hard to not be so enchanted by him; hence why junichi inevitably starts calling him “sunshine”.

i love them together, i loved seeing them shed so many layers, even if it does get them hurt, because they learn so much more about themselves that they didn’t think was possible before. i loved how other characters we’re very familiar with added more depth and support in the longest book of this entire series, haruka & nino having such integral roles even without being the central pov’s as i was used to with the previous books. the author did a fantastic job in this book when it came to switching pov’s, because in this story, there was nothing directly in haruka & nino’s povs, which could’ve gone very badly if the second book wasn’t indicative enough. but jae & junichi’s characters are just phenomenal….i wish i could get to read more about them, they captured my heart completely. this world of vampires is such an ambitious and captivating landscape, i definitely can’t wait to see what more stories the author has to tell.

content warnings:
sexually explicit content, descriptions of blood & malnourishment, death, emotional & physical abuse, exploration of grief & PTSD