(A-) 80% | Very Good Notes: A kind of jailed-princess tale (bit Nineteen Eighty-Four), on wounding feuds, abusive dudes, relentless grief and more.
*Che(A-) 80% | Very Good Notes: A kind of jailed-princess tale (bit Nineteen Eighty-Four), on wounding feuds, abusive dudes, relentless grief and more.
*Check out progress updates for detailed commentary: (view spoiler)[
Progress updates:
01/17/2024 - Preamble [image] (1) So, I didn't plan to read this now. I had a library hold with an estimated wait of 6-18 weeks, but somehow managed to snag a skip-the-line copy. - The trade-off is I only have 7 (now 6) days to finish this. Which shouldn't be a problem, but it's still a major risk. (2) This should check off my "non-fiction" and "recent mega-bestseller" reading goals for the year.
01/18/2024 - Prologue–Chapter 8 [image] (1) In addition to being full of personality, the start of the book, up to the account of her birth, is beautifully written. - Even just reading the two-paragraph prologue, I already have a far greater sense of Britney Spears the person than I ever did of Meghan Markle in the entirety of Prince Harry's "Spare"—2023's other blockbuster memoir. - Just from the prologue, we learn what she did in her spare time, how her family life was, and a bit of what she believes spiritually. (2) "When I was alone with my thoughts, my mind filled with worries and fears. Music stopped the noise, made me feel confident, and took me to a pure place of expressing myself exactly as I wanted to be seen and heard. Singing took me into the presence of the divine." - Britney writes at length about her family history of alcoholism and abuse, stretching back several generations. It's seemingly a chain reaction that might explain her stranger, more erratic public moments, though she herself makes no direct connection. - The whole idea of performing as a way to escape personal chaos and exert some control over life can be a bit cliché, but she writes with enough warts-and-all honesty that it really does work here. - In contrast to some other autobiographies I've read, she's not trashing her family. You get the sense that all this is written with love and not mean-spiritedness. (3) This being a musician's memoir, it starts off with a section about what singing means to her. It's the best written portion of the book, which makes sense since you'd want to make the best first impression, if anything for the sake of juicing up free preview chapters. - The book, however, does settle down into more straightforward and plain-spoken stories. Once she steps into the picture, and the sordid family history's over, the book feels less special. Though, it's no chore to read—I actually have to make an effort to stop. (4) For some reason, it's always fascinating to me when famous people meet other famous people when they're not famous. - Britney Spears and Natalie Portman being co-understudies for an off-Broadway musical feels like such a weird pairing. (5) "By thirteen, I was drinking with my mom and smoking with my friends. I had my first cigarette at my one 'bad' friend's house." - Given her family history, I suspected that bad habits and vices might be passed down from parent to child. It's just strange to hear of a parent directly encouraging those vices, and at such a young age. - Her mom does have a major problem with Britney smoking, so there's at least that, though she's a smoker herself—they're both Virginia Slims girls. (6) "The night before we recorded '… Baby One More Time,' I was listening to Soft Cell’s 'Tainted Love' and fell in love with that sound. I stayed up late so that I’d go into the studio tired, my voice fried. It worked. When I sang, it came out gravelly in a way that sounded more mature and sexier." - All the cigarette smoking probably helped that too, to be honest. - Sure, that's why you stayed up so late. - Next time I listen to that song, I'm going to have to pay attention for that. (7) Britney loses her virginity at 13 to her 17 year-old boyfriend. - So, that whole bit about still being a virgin was totally bogus, eh? I feel so disillusioned!
01/19/2024 - Chapters 9–17 [image] (1) Britney likes to describe herself as "innocent" a lot. - Every time she does I can't help but think, "But you're 'not that innocent,' you told us so!" (2) Wow! Apparently, Justin Timberlake's a real scumbag! I'd have never guessed. - Their relationship sort of reminds me of Charles and Diana: he openly cheats on her, so she cheats on him. - Britney and Justin lived together in Orlando when she was still in her teens. I can't tell you how many times while reading this I'd just shake my head and think, "That's just way too young." (2) "The label came to me with a concept for the '… Baby One More Time' video in which I would play a futuristic astronaut. The mock-up I saw had me looking like a Power Ranger. That image didn't resonate with me, and I had a feeling my audience wouldn't relate to it, either." - That sounds an awful lot like the "Oops ... I Did it Again" video, which is ironic given the title. - Seems like the label got their way in the end, possibly to recoup development costs. (3) "The director for the ["... Baby One More Time"] video, Nigel Dick, was open to my ideas. In addition to the school bell cuing the start of the dancing, I added that it was important that there be cute boys." - Whew! Glad she said "boys" there. You know, given her inclination toward older guys. (4) "In the pop dance world, there are two camps. Most people will say that LA dancers are better. No disrespect to them, but my spirit has always liked New York dancers best—they have more heart." - Hmm, I wonder if the dance wars are anything like the East Coast/West Coast rap wars? I envision more twirling. (5) Britney went on a twenty-six mall tour to promote her debut single. - Wow! That's so very '90s. You'd be lucky to find many malls still around and operational these days. (6) We learn that Britney's real hair color is black. - Exactly how long has she been dying her hair? That much bleach can't be good for your health. - The darkest I've ever seen her hair was light brown. (7) The whole period covering her early success is really glossed over quickly. Sucks for me, because this is the time of her life and career that I'm most interested in. - Though, I can sort of understand since it's only the space of a few years. And additionally, years with Justin she probably wants to put behind her. - I guess it's not really a departure from the rest of the book. She doesn't so much tell stories as she drops a lot of quick anecdotes. This book never really dwells on anything for too long. - Possibly, it's meant to convey how much of a whirlwind this period was. (8) "Was I mad at being 'outed' by [Justin] as sexually active? No. To be honest with you, I liked that Justin said that. Why did my managers work so hard to claim I was some kind of young-girl virgin even into my twenties? Whose business was it if I’d had sex or not?" - Well, at least she addressed the virginity thing. Reading about her less-than-virginal youth, I thought I'd imagined it. - I must correct myself from earlier. She lost her virginity at 14, not 13. My math didn't add right. (9) Probably the biggest revelation to come from this memoir is that Justin made Britney have an abortion. - Which, the way she describes it, sounds more like she wanted to keep it but acceded to his wishes because she thought he was smarter than her. (10) Justin breaks up with Britney over text. Later on he visits her and gives her a framed letter that he wrote. - I don't know what's more bizarre, framing a letter before you give it to someone, or the fact that Britney still keeps it under her bed. (11) It sort of makes sense how Britney would turn a blind eye to Justin's infidelity and emotional abuse. She writes that his family was more family to her than her own. - Boy, Britney really throws Jamie-Lynn Spears under the bus. Calls her a "bitch" and a "witch." (12) "'We have to get this annulled,' [my parents] said. They made way too big of a deal out of innocent fun." - I wouldn't exactly describe drunkenly marrying your childhood friend as "innocent fun." I'd have to side with her wicked parents on this one. - You know, even though it's not mentioned here, I still remember her short-lived husband's name was Jason Alexander. I remember thinking at the time, "Britney Spears married the guy from Seinfeld?"
01/20/2024 - Chapters 18–25 [image] (1) "[Kevin Federline] was getting ready to shoot the cover for his album. He was in the studio all the time. He really thought he was a rapper now. Bless his heart—because he did take it so seriously." - LOL! Britney low-key trashing K-Fed's rap career is so far the best thing about this book! - The "bless his heart" really twists the knife. (2) "Kevin had a 'bad boy' image. Still, I had no idea when we met that he had a toddler, nor that his ex-girlfriend was eight months pregnant with his second baby. I was clueless ... had no idea until after we’d been together for a while and someone told me, 'You know he has a new baby, right?'" - I don't know about this supposed "bad boy" image. I seem to remember everyone treating him like a joke and a poser. Besides, I can't really think of any other "bad boy" dancers. - I can understand the whole baby-daddy conversation not exactly being first-date material, but c'mon. Don't leave it to the point where other people have to bring it up. - Maybe she's mistaking "bad boy" for "bad guy"? - It's interesting how through the whole Kevin Federline section, Britney never says how they met or even mentions that he was one of her backup dancers. If you knew absolutely nothing, you'd read this book and think he was a fellow musician. (3) "The Onyx Hotel Tour was just rough. It was too sexual, for a start. Justin had embarrassed me publicly, so my rebuttal onstage was to kind of go there a little bit, too. But it was absolutely horrible. I hated it in the moment." - These celebrities and their musical revenge tours! Not every public drama has to be given expression through song and dance. - Finally, Britney thinking something is "too sexual." I was beginning to worry she had no personal boundaries. (4) "We would hire an amazing chef—too expensive to use very often. But one time, eating something the chef cooked, I said, 'Oh my God, this is the most delicious thing I’ve ever had and can you just live with us? I love you so much!' And I meant it—I loved him." - That's the problem with Britney, she falls in love too easily. With Federline, it was just cuddling in a pool. - Must be some chef! One of the wealthiest women in the world, and this guy is a special occasion meal. (5) "I could smell the weed wafting out of the studio door before I even walked in. [Kevin] and the other guys would all be getting high, and it felt like I was in the way. I wasn’t invited to their party." - One thing Britney definitely hates is the smell of weed. She mentions it several times. Real mystery, then, why she would propose to a pothead. - Interesting thing to bother a life-long smoker. I guess you just get used to your own smells. (6) "People say he’s going to break up with me while I have tiny children, like he did with the mother of his first two children when they were infants, but no way! How he was with his other family won’t be the way he is with me." - Yeah, Britney would do well to start listening to people. - Though, technically she broke up with him... but only because he was about to break up with her and she didn't want to be dumped. (7) "One time he came home late and told me he’d been at a party. 'Justin Timberlake was there!' he said. 'Lindsay Lohan was, too!'" - Britney goes on and on about how clueless she can be. I tell you, she's got nothing on Federline... name-dropping Justin Timberlake to Britney Spears! (8) "Looking back, I think that both Justin and Kevin were very clever. They knew what they were doing, and I played right into it." - This is a pretty vague statement. Though, the implication I'm getting is that both Justin and Kevin got with Britney in order to launch their solo music careers. Also, they knew she was too shy and submissive to push back on their bad behavior. - I don't know if I'm entirely on board with that. It's extremely cynical, thinking of them both as kind of gold-diggers. Though, would Justin Timberlake be as big a star if he hadn't dated Britney? Certainly, no one would even know who Kevin Federline is. (9) "I went into a hair salon, and I took the clippers, and I shaved off all my hair. Everyone thought it was hilarious. Look how crazy she is! Even my parents acted embarrassed by me. But nobody seemed to understand that I was simply out of my mind with grief." - I can understand the whole idea of giving the press the middle-finger by taking away the "Britney" they knew and expected, but I don't know if the public took it the same way. - Frankly, the only conclusion would be that she'd gone crazy, which she pretty much admits here. - I may be naïve, but if you're shaving your head, why would you need to go to a hair salon? - Bold and rebellious perhaps, but it doesn't help when you're fighting for custody of your kids and K-Fed's been insisting you're a bad mother. (10) "The interior designer was completely against it. He said, 'Marble floors are super slippery and hard if you fall down.' 'I want marble!' I shouted. 'I need marble.'" - Britney does a good deal of apologizing to people in this book, mostly for erratic behavior during the time she was seemingly permanently pregnant and high on hormones. Contractors, in this case. (11) Speaking of which, she apologizes to her sister's co-star for going on set and chewing her out for starting rumors about Jamie Lynn. Turns out she was innocent. - Jamie Lynn Spears comes off terribly in this book! She's one of the villains: Justin's a philanderer, Kevin's a weed-addict and Jamie Lynn's a rich bitch.
(B-) 69% | Satisfactory Notes: Mainly filler (interest-killer), he says so precious little, scandal shame but shifts the blame: just wimpy, whiny, brit(B-) 69% | Satisfactory Notes: Mainly filler (interest-killer), he says so precious little, scandal shame but shifts the blame: just wimpy, whiny, brittle.
*Check out progress updates for detailed commentary: (view spoiler)[
Progress updates:
12/18/2023 - Preamble [image] (1) I know I'm awful late to the party, but I always said that I was waiting for the book to go on clearance, and it finally did. (2) I don't read all that many non-fiction books, but I do try to read at least one a year. So, this lets me tick that box for 2023. (3) I'm something of a Royal Family aficionado. - I'm also Canadian, so technically Harry's my Prince too.
12/19/2023 - Prologue–Part 1.20 [image] (1) Only 50 pages in and I have lots to say. (2) Interestingly, the book begins in the days leading up to Diana's death. We're not told of Harry's life before this and, this being chronological, I doubt we're going back to revisit his childhood. - Literally and figuratively, this is how his story begins. (3) For nonfiction books, my expectation is to be told something I don't already know, and to do so stylistically in a way that justifies my expenditure of precious leisure time. - Having said that, this book begins not saying much at all and doing all it can to avoid getting to the point. (4) The prologue is all about Harry's meeting with Charles and William at Prince Philip's funeral. It's a lot of dithering and meandering: flowery language to mask the fact that we're not really told much at all. - Harry describes waiting for this family meeting as being like "embarking on a quest." His brother and father, he says, appeared to be "in league" against him. - We do get the now iconic line from Charles: "Please, boys—don’t make my final years a misery." (5) Frequently peppered into this verbal miasma is some amateur philosophy, of the type you'd more expect from an angsty adolescent than a middle-aged military vet with a wife and kids. - For example, if not for his parent's marriage he wouldn't be alive. On the other hand, if not for his parent's marriage, maybe his mother would still be alive. - Indeed, profound stuff. Excuse me as I recover from having my mind blown! (6) Harry calls Charles and William "Pa" and "Willy." Respectively, they call him "darling boy" and "Harold." - It all makes sense except for "Harold." Harry himself states that his name is actually Henry. So, what's the deal with "Harold"? Is it a joke because his common name is already a diminutive nickname? - "Pa" and "Willy" make it seem like you'd more likely find them in a log cabin in Appalachia than a European palace. (7) I'm having a hard time settling into the writing style. It seems all over the place. - Mostly, it's a lot of wistfulness and waxing lyrical. Though, occasionally you'll get the odd crass comment injected, as if to remind people he's a regular human being who curses and lusts and acts objectionably like everyone else. It just feels incongruous and try-hard. (8) Like everyone else, I have my personal opinions about Harry and Meghan. Though, I'm trying to read this with as open a mind and being as objective as possible. That said, at least this far in, Harry doesn't seem particularly likeable. - He writes as if he has no agency in his own life. Everybody's doing stuff to him, and all he can do is stand there and take the bullets. It's an entirely passive posture and, frankly, comes off as whiny. - I'd never have thought this book would be encumbered with such fluffy, wimpy prose. I mean, there's a passage where he says he prefers Steinbeck to Shakespeare because the writing's more straightforward. Ironic, considering the way he chose to write this. (9) The best part of this so far is Harry's description of how Diana's death affected him. - It feels honest and raw, and very unlike the rest of the book—which expresses the same tone of vulnerability throughout, but for things that don't necessarily warrant it.
12/20/2023 - Parts 1.21–1.48 [image] (1) On losing virginity: "She liked horses, quite a lot, and treated me not unlike a young stallion. Quick ride, after which she'd smacked my rump and sent me off to graze. Among the many things about it that were wrong: It happened in a grassy field behind a busy pub." - Please never write romance novels! - Merely one of many such metaphors. (2) This book is best when it eschews all its opinions and flowery language and just tells stories. - I'm honestly quite enthralled reading about shooting stags in Scotland, trying to make the Queen Mother laugh at a picnic, and learning how his best friend died in a car crash. - In general, I'm fine with authors opining about events so far as it's interesting. Harry's opinions, however, are terribly lightweight. (3) Harry repeatedly mentions seeing "red mist" when enraged. - The way he describes it, you'd think he's Dexter or something. (4) There's a lot of metaphors used in this book. The one stated at the top is possibly the most infamous. I don't think any of them actually work. - It's just more flowery language. - They're meant to sound deep and/or clever, but at best they just fall flat, at worst they're fairly cringe and classless. (5) Harry describes his father as seemingly the most loving dad in the world, while at the same time ascribes him appalling motives and without real evidence more than hearsay and speculation. - I can't get a beat on their relationship. There's no real middle ground, it's all extremes. - The idea that his father conspires with the evil press to throw Harry under the bus, in order to look good in comparison, is quite the statement. - Frankly, he's much more complimentary of Camilla, though I expect that to change as we go on. (6) "Mummy’s former butler had penned a tell-all, which actually told nothing. It was merely one man's self-justifying, self-centering version of events." - He writes without the smallest sense of irony.
12/21/2023 - Parts 1.22–2.19 [image] (1) Kate Middleton appears only once so far, during Harry's Nazi costume scandal. - He sort of throws her and William under the bus for not telling him it was a bad idea, and even jokingly encouraging it. - He does write about how much shame he felt following the incident, though you never do get the sense he believes it's entirely his fault. (2) Nearly all of Part 2 seemingly covers Harry's military career. I don't think it's a stretch to say no one bought this to read about that. - Ironic since his time in the military and the few years following were the point where he was most loved by the public. - It's interesting enough, but only because it's about Harry and the ghostwriter does a good job of not making it sound dull as dirt. - Really, it's information that isn't unique to him, and not terribly exciting due to the fact that he was more or less kept from danger. - You do notice the absence of the book's heretofore dominant flowery prose and colorful metaphors. I get the sense that it's not just the reader that wants to get this over with and move onto juicier subject matter. (3) Interesting how no one except military figures are given surnames here. More than that, Harry uses diminutives and nicknames if at all applicable. - Possibly not to identify anyone, though it's easy enough to guess, for example, that "Chels" is Chelsey Davy. - Even photographers and newspapers he calls "Paps" as if they're a singular person, his arch nemesis.
12/23/2023 - Parts 2.20–2.47 [image] (1) "My penis was oscillating between extremely sensitive and borderline traumatized ... I’d been trying some home remedies, including one recommended by a friend. She'd urged me to apply Elizabeth Arden cream. My mum used that on her lips. You want me to put that on my todger?" - Seriously? Does every story have to reference your mom? - Apparently yes, because every story has. (2) It becomes increasingly clear that the most interesting thing about Harry is his family. When he's not talking about his family, this book becomes an absolute chore. - He recounts his time in Afghanistan like reading a car owner's manual. Just colorless tedium. (3) Harry spends an inordinate amount of time talking about his many flying lessons. Which is about as exciting and illuminating as reading about someone's piano lessons. - Yes, things are very difficult if you've never done them before, then they get easier. That's how things normally go! (4) Harry spends an inordinate amount of time talking about his frostbitten penis. - The entirety of his brother's wedding is bookended by penis talk, with bits sprinkled in as well. - The moral of all this is that time heals all wounds, including his frostbitten penis. Excuse me as I recover from having my mind blown! (5) There's a whole lot of humble-bragging going on here. Harry takes every opportunity to pat himself on the back and big himself up in comparison to other people's failures and shortcomings. - He passes his helicopter test while a guy after him fails so bad the fire trucks are called in. - While other royals only symbolically plant trees on foreign visits, Harry insists on actually planting trees. - He passes his military psychological stress test while the two other guys literally go insane. (6) For all the time he talks about his lady loves, Chels and Flack and Flea, we never do get a sense of their personalities, just that they can't handle the media swarm that Harry's so sadly used to. - The closest we get is that Chels "wanted to travel, have fun, be young," which is essentially saying nothing of value. (7) Harry spends an inordinate amount of time lambasting journalists and specifically two photographers he dubs Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber. - As much as he insists this isn't punching down, it really is and only adds to the overall feeling of condescension and smugness in the writing.
12/24/2023 - Parts 2.48–2.79 [image] Wishing you a very Harry Christmas and a Harry New Year!
(1) "If you like reading pure bollocks then royal biographies are just your thing." - Gee, thanks! You couldn't have warned me at the start of the book? - I wonder whether or not he's self-aware? (2) Another 50 pages, another embarrassing, self-inflicted scandal blamed on others. - Despite being the one suggesting a game of strip-pool in a hotel suite full of wasted partygoers, it's apparently the fault of the drunk girl who took the pictures and the evil papers that bought them. (3) Harry's military adventures are sort of exciting, but only in a video game sort of way. - They're purely time-killers/page-fillers. By the end of this, I will have remembered none of them. (4) Harry publicly states his kill-count: twenty-five. I remember him being criticized for this on the news, it being highly taboo among the military. - Never being in the military, it doesn't bother me. What does bother me is that he seemingly brings it up merely to morally justify it. - I mean, it's a given that soldiers kill, and that if you join the army you're going to be at the very least complicit in killing. Why even bring it up? (5) Ironic, how Harry names his pet project the Invictus Games. - "Invictus" being Latin for "not a victim," whereas this book is entirely about Harry being a victim. (6) Another 50 pages, another breakup with a girlfriend who can't handle the spotlight. - In this case, Cress. We know even less about her than the other girlfriends we know nothing about, just that she's friends with Harry's cousin Euge.
12/26/2023 - Parts 2.80–3.19 [image] (1) "She wore a flannel shirt, a bulky overcoat and a beanie, but I was still surprised that no one was recognizing her. Plenty of Brits watched Suits, surely, yet no one was staring." - Sorry, but did I just wake up in some bizarro reality where Suits is an international phenomenon and Meghan Markle's a Madonna-level celebrity? - To hear Harry tell it, Meghan's a substantially bigger star than he is. - Frankly, I've never seen Suits mentioned in print more than I have in these initial Meghan chapters. (2) We get a lot more tone-deaf humble-bragging by Harry. - Wow! He does his own laundry and goes to brick-and-mortar stores to buy his own clothes and groceries. Impressive! - He scolds an older couple for badgering a cashier. So heroic! (3) Reading about Harry's dates with Meghan is like sitting through a relative's interminable vacation slideshow. It's never really about them, but the colorful things happening around them. - Unfortunately, like Harry's other girlfriends, I don't get any sense of Meghan as a person. Harry goes on and on about how perfect and beautiful she is, and how everyone but the evil press immediately and entirely loves her. Which tells me absolutely nothing. (4) I'm not going to begrudge anyone for being in love and wanting to let the world know about it but, frankly, the uxoriousness here makes me want to vomit. - The whole relationship feels entirely fake and factory-processed. I'm not saying it didn't unfold the way he tells it, but it's a level of saccharine meet cute that puts Hallmark movies to shame. (5) The Harry/Meghan relationship is portrayed as your typical opposites-attract romantic comedy. He's an introverted stoner slob while she's a fashionable celebrity and accomplished businesswoman. - A big deal's made about how Meghan has no idea who Harry is and how he's deathly afraid she might google him and learn of his many scandals. I mean, are we going to pretend that a woman living a good part of the year in London doesn't know who Prince Harry is? - "At bedtime I guided Meg through the darkness to the tent. Where’s the flashlight? Meg asked. You mean the torch? We both laughed." (6) The only characters in the book that get any sort of discernable personality are Charles and William, arguably the two you'd least need to flesh out. William here is portrayed as a bully who's inexplicably competitive with Harry, of whom he's simultaneously jealous of and embarrassed to be seen with. - As usual, Harry is the quintessential victim. Passive to his own detriment, never fighting back. - According to Harry, he wants to help Africa because he genuinely cares, whereas William wants to help Africa for PR and clout.
(A) 87% | Extraordinary Notes: The first novel-length book I'd ever finished over the span of one day. Done over two sittings, with a nap in between.(A) 87% | Extraordinary Notes: The first novel-length book I'd ever finished over the span of one day. Done over two sittings, with a nap in between....more
(B+) 79% | Good Notes: An effective, inviting blend of history and memoir. Though the word "melancholy" is overused to the point of cliché.(B+) 79% | Good Notes: An effective, inviting blend of history and memoir. Though the word "melancholy" is overused to the point of cliché....more
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