And Then Quotes

“All you do is think. Because all you do is think, you've constructed two separate worlds—one inside your head and one outside. Just the fact that you tolerate this enormous dissonance—why, that's a great intangible failure already.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“If he let one day pass without glancing at a single page, habit led him to feel a vague sense of decay. Therefore, in the face of most intrusions, he tried to arrange it so that he could stay in touch with the printed word. There were moments when he felt that books constituted his only legitimate province.”
― Natsume Soseki, And Then

“People forget their faces when they're busy.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“It had become a habit with him lately to listen to his heart's pulsation while lying in bed. As usual, the palpitation was calm and steady. With his hand still on his chest, he tried to imagine the warm, crimson blood flowing leisurely to this beat. This was life, he thought. Now, at this very moment, he held in his grasp the current of life as it flowed by. To his palm it felt like the ticking of a clock. But it was more, it was a kind of alarm that summoned him to death. If it were possible to live without hearing this bell--if only his heart did not measure out time as well as blood--then how carefree he would be! How thoroughly he would savor life! But--and here Daisuke shuddered involuntarily. He was a man so attached to life that he could scarcely bear to picture his heart calmly beating to the coursing of his blood. There were times when, lying in bed, he would place his hand just below his left breast and wonder, what if someone gave me one good blow with a hammer here. Although he lived in sound health, there were instances when his consciousness awakened to the indisputable fact of his being alive as a near-miracle of good fortune.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“There was a time when his father had looked like gold to him. Many of his seniors had looked like gold. Anybody who had attained a certain high level of education had looked like gold. Therefore, his own gold plating had been all the more painful, and he had been impatient to become solid gold himself. But once his keen eye penetrated directly to the inner layers of these other people, his efforts suddenly came to seem foolish.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“It was Daisuke's conviction that all morality traced its origins to social realities. He believed there could be no greater confusion of cause and effect than to attempt to conform social reality to a rigidly predetermined notion of morality. Accordingly, he found the ethical education conducted by lecture in Japanese schools utterly meaningless. In the schools, students were either instructed in the old morality or crammed with a morality suited to the average European. For an unfortunate people beset by the fierce appetites of life, this amounted to nothing more than vain, empty talk. When the recipients of this education saw society before their eyes, they would recall those lectures and burst out laughing. Or else they would feel that they had been made fools of. In Daisuke's case it was not just school; he had received the most rigorous and least functional education from his father. Thanks to this, he had at one time experienced acute anguish stemming from contradictions. Daisuke even felt bitter over it.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“here was no way of knowing what path he would take from there, but in order to survive as a human being, he was sure to arrive at the fate of having to incur the dislike of other human beings. When that time came, he would probably clothe himself inconspicuously, so as not to attract attention, and beggarlike, linger about the market places of man, in search of something.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“He was on the verge of saying something kind, but decided it was too much trouble and stopped.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“It's like the frog that tried to outdo the cow...see, the consequences are reflected in each of us as individuals. A people so oppressed by the West have no mental leisure, they can't do anything worthwhile. They get an education that's stripped to the bare bone, and they're driven with their noses to the grindstone until they're dizzy -- that's why they all end up with nervous breakdowns. Try talking to them -- they're usually stupid. They haven't thought about a thing beyond themselves, that day, that very instant. They're too exhausted to think about anything else; it's not their fault. Unfortunately, exhaustion of the spirit and deterioration of the body come hand-in-hand. And that's not all. The decline of morality has set in too. Look where you will in this country, you won't find one square inch of brightness. It's all pitch black. So what difference would it make...”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Daisuke was the sort of man who, once he was disturbed by something, no matter what, could not let go of it until he had pursued it to the utmost. Moreover, having the capacity to assess the folly of any given obsession, he was forced to be doubly conscious of it. Three of four years ago he had tackled the question of the process whereby his waking mind entered the realm of dreams. At night, when he had gotten under the covers and begun to doze off nicely, he would immediately think, this is it, this is how I fall asleep. No sooner had he thought of this than he was wide awake. When he had managed to doze off again, he would immediately think, here it is. Night after night, he was plagued by his curiosity and would repeat the same procedure two or three times. In the end, he became disgusted in spite of himself. He wanted somehow to escape his agony. Moreover, he was thoroughly impressed by the extent of his folly. To appeal to his conscious mind in order to apprehend his unconscious, and to try to recollect both at the same time was, as James had put it, analogous to lighting a candle to examine the dark, or stopping a top in order to study is movements; at that rate, it stood to reason that he would never again be able to sleep. He knew all this, but when night came, he still thought, now...”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“That Seigo could go into geisha houses, accept luncheon invitations, drop in at the Club, see people off at Shimabashi, meet them at Yokohama, run out to Oiso to humor the elders—that he could put in his appearance at large gatherings from morning to evening without seeming either triumphant or dejected—this must be because he was thoroughly accustomed to this kind of life, thought Daisuke; it was probably like the jellyfish's floating in the sea and not finding it salty.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“He had always been a middle-of-the-road sort. He had never submitted word for word to anyone's command, but neither had he passionately rebelled against anyone's advice. Depending upon the interpretation, this was the posture of a schemer or the strategy of a born vacillator. If he himself had been confronted with either of these charges, he could not have avoided wondering if they might not be true. But in large part, this was to be attributed neither to artifice nor to vacillation but rather to the flexibility of his vision, which allowed him to look in both directions at once. To this day, it was precisely this capacity that had always dampened his determination to advance singlemindedly toward a particular goal. It was not unusual for him to stand paralyzed in the midst of a situation. His posture of upholding the status quo was not the result of poverty of thought, but the product of lucid judgment; but he had never understood this truth about himself until he acted upon his beliefs with inviolable courage. The situation with Michiyo was precisely a case in point.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“According to his thinking, man was not born for a particular purpose. Quite the opposite: a purpose developed only with the birth of an individual. To objectively fabricate a purpose at the outset and to apply it to a human being was to rob him at birth of freedom of action. Hence, purpose was something that the individual had to make for himself. But no one, no matter who, could freely create a purpose. This was because the purpose of one's existence was as good as announced to the universe by the course of that existence itself.

Starting from this premise, Daisuke held that one's natural activities constituted one's natural purposes. A man walked because he wanted to. Then walking became his purpose. He thought because he wanted to. Then, thinking became his purpose. Just as to walk or to think for a particular purpose meant the degradation of walking and thinking, so to establish an external purpose and to act to fulfill it meant the degradation of action. Accordingly, those who used the sum of their actions as a means to an end were in effect destroying the purpose of their own existence.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Daisuke, "Kalbiniz daha tam iyileşmedi mi?" diye üzgün bir ifadeyle sordu.
"Hayatım boyunca hiç iyi olmayacak ki...”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Daisuke was of course equipped with conversation that, even if they went further, would allow him to retreat as if nothing had happened. He had always wondered at the conversations recorded in Western novels, for to him they were too bald, too self indulgent, and moreover, too unsubtly rich. However they read in the original, he thought they reflected a taste that could not be translated into Japanese. Therefore, he had not the slightest intention of using imported phrases to develop his relationship with Michiyo. Between the two of them at least, ordinary words sufficed perfectly well. But the danger was of slipping from point A to point B without realizing it. Daisuke managed to stand his ground only by a hair's breadth. When he left, Michiyo saw him to the entranceway and said, "Do come again, please? It's so lonely.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Anyone who sang the praises of undying love in this day and age belonged to the first rank of hypocrites in Daisuke's estimate.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“There, sitting cross-legged on the floor, he stared absently at his legs. They began to look strange. They no longer seemed to grow from his trunk at all, but rather, completely unconnected, they sprawled rudely before him. When he got this far, he realized something he had never noticed before—that his legs were unbearably hideous. With hair growing unevenly and blue streaks running rampant, they were terribly strange creatures.”
― Sōseki Natsume, And Then

“I think there's nothing more worthless than this so-called worldly experience. All it can do is cause pain.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Dürüstlük ve samimiyet bende mevcut. Sadece bu özelliklerimi insanlarda uygulayamıyorum."
"Nedenmiş?"
Daisuke yanıt vermekte zorlandı. Ona göre dürüstlük de, samimiyet de yüreğinizde hazır tuttuğunuz şeyler değildi. Demirin taşa sürtündüğü zamanda kıvılcım çıkarması gibiydi. Karşıdaki kişiye bağlı olarak, ancak sağlıklı bir bağ kurulduğunda bu olgu oluşabilirdi iki kişi arasında. Kişinin kendisinde bulunması gereken bir özellik olduğu kadar, karşılıklı bir ruhsal ilişkinin de sonucuydu. Bu nedenle, karşınızdaki doğru kişi değilsei insanda bu hisler oluşamazdı.”
― Natsume Soseki; Alan Turney, And Then

“Ona göre dürüstlük de, samimiyet de yüreğinizde hazır tuttuğunuz şeyler değildi. Demirin taşa sürtündüğü zamanda kıvılcım çıkarması gibiydi. Karşıdaki kişiye bağlı olarak, ancak sağlıklı bir bağ kurulduğunda bu olgu oluşabilirdi iki kişi arasında. Kişinin kendisinde bulunması gereken bir özellik olduğu kadar, karşılıklı bir ruhsal ilişkinin de sonucuydu bu. Bu nedenle, karşınızdaki doğru kişi değilse, insanda bu hisler oluşamazdı.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Sen dünyayı olduğu gibi kabul eden bir adamsın. Diğer bir deyişle, iradesini ortaya koyamayan bir adamsın. Çalışmaya dair bir isteğim, iradem yok dersen, sana inanmam. Sonuçta insansın. Bahse girerim her zaman bir şeyleri kaçırıyormuş gibi hissediyorsundur, bu da benim düşüncemi kanıtlıyor. Kendi irademi gerçek dünyaya uygulamadan ve bu dünyanın bir dereceye kadar, sadece benim iradem nedeniyle, hoşuma gidecek biçimde değiştiğine dair somut bir kanıt bulmadan yaşayamazdım ben. Sen sadece düşünüyorsun. Sadece düşündüğün için de zihnindeki dünya ile zihninin dışında iki farklı dünya kurmuş, öyle yaşıyorsun. Bu büyük uyumsuzluğa katlanman-manevi açıdan kocaman bir hata değil mi bu?”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Hiçbir insanın bir başkasını küçümseme duygusu olmadan iletişim kuramadığı çağdaş toplum, Daisuke'nin yirminci yüzyılın çöküşü dediği şeyi teşkil ediyordu. Son zamanlarda aniden kabaran yaşam iştahları, ahlak içgüdüsü üzerinde aşırı baskı yapıyordu ve onun çöküşünün habercisi durumundaydı. ÜStelik bu fenomeni Daisuke eski ve yeniye ait isteklerin çarpışması olarak da görüyordu.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Daisuke başından aşağı soğuk sular dökülmüş gibi ürperdi. Toplum içinde gezinen iki ruh birbiriyle karşılaşmış ve aralarında bir delik açılmış gibi birbirlerine bakmışlardı. Sonra her şey tersine dönmüş, onları bir araya getiren güç, korku içinde çarpışmıştı.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then

“Her ikisi de bu halde yıllardır duruyormuş gibi ruhlarının heyecanla titrediğini hissettiler. Bu heyecanla birlikte her ikisi de peş peşe yaşam bilincini kaybettiler. Aşklarının azabını ve aşklarının kurbanı olma duygusunu aynı anda tatmışlar, aynı zamanda gerçeklerin farkına varmışlardı.”
― Natsume Sōseki, And Then