My John Rosemond fandom continues. He encourages parents not to skip to the "how-to's" (chapters 3/4/5) and instead focus on the foundation of why kidMy John Rosemond fandom continues. He encourages parents not to skip to the "how-to's" (chapters 3/4/5) and instead focus on the foundation of why kids are the way they are, and how parenting (formerly child-rearing) has changed since the 1960's, and it has absolutely changed. He really is the lone wolf in the wilderness talking about this subject. The how-to's were very practical (the charts can get a little complicated, but I understand the purpose and execution), but really it's your approach to your children (authority), and your role in their lives (leadership). As well as your relationship to your spouse (of utmost importance). I bought this as a handbook, but it's also a handy reminder of how important those biblical principles (and he recaps some of these at the end of the book) are to raising children: love God, love your spouse, use discipline wisely and hold the line, and provide leadership to your children. I'm to the point where with basically almost any recommendation he makes, we're trying out. Most of them were how I was raised (I was born in the 70s and my parents in the 40s), and my mantra is: "It worked for me/my husband, it'll work for him." That's doesn't completely track with everything, but about 94% of it. ...more
I love all things John Rosemond, and this was no exception. His points are just so practical and sensible. The older I (and my child) get, the more hiI love all things John Rosemond, and this was no exception. His points are just so practical and sensible. The older I (and my child) get, the more his ways make sense to me....more
I love all of Cloud and Townsend's books on boundaries. I think they're just brilliant. We have a very spirited 5-year old, who attends a classical ChI love all of Cloud and Townsend's books on boundaries. I think they're just brilliant. We have a very spirited 5-year old, who attends a classical Christian school, so I really want to ground his behavior (and our discipline) in Christian principles--that he should be respectful, understand limits, not violate others' boundaries, exhibit kindness, generosity, and gratitude...I mean, being a good person is hard work, and it's hard work BECOMING a good person! (We're all in development, aren't we??)
I want to make sure I'm setting clear expectations, giving him choices, setting clear consequences, and getting him to be responsible for those choices and understand limits. I don't want him to be entitled or ungrateful. I want him to be able to control his impulses and have self-control. But a huge chunk of that is my husband and me, and our ability to set and keep limits (and not getting triggered when our son tests those limits, which he does CONSTANTLY. We have to self-manage!)
Setting and keeping those boundaries is good for him and good for us....more
This was an incredibly eye-opening book to me. My husband and I have discussed possibly homeschooling our (now 5-year old) son in the future, but I doThis was an incredibly eye-opening book to me. My husband and I have discussed possibly homeschooling our (now 5-year old) son in the future, but I don' think I knew what "homeschool" actually meant, and after reading this book, it made me speed up that potential timeline considerably. My husband already sent a Wild + Free podcast episode to me (about critical thinking) which is why this caught my attention at the library. And overall, it just really spoke to me, especially because we have a very creative, chatty, quick, unique little kid, and I don't want to crush that curiosity or spirit as he goes through school. He's going to a private school in the fall for kindergarten that we're pretty excited about, but after that...who knows? Arment really sells the idea of having the freedom to spend with your kids and allowing them to learn at their own pace rather than the artificial pace of a classroom directed by the teacher. And for me, the parent, it just feels so FREEING. I don't know, it just sounded so...idyllic? (Arment would say I'm overselling it). We're so used to being scheduled, structured, and required to work/revolve around others that I think we forgot what it would be like to just be free to learn WHATEVER we want, at whatever pace we want, solely based on our interest and curiosity. It sounds just wonderful. A few parts of it are precious (the "+" in Wild + Free, and the constant reference to "mamas", not moms or mothers), but all is forgiven. It was a great book....more
I LOVED this. I have a spirited 4-year old, and have been very interested in the positive discipline model (and have read a few positive discipline boI LOVED this. I have a spirited 4-year old, and have been very interested in the positive discipline model (and have read a few positive discipline books), but I really appreciated her writing style, her examples, and her toolkit. A good friend with a similar spirited kiddo told me she was reading this, and I picked it up and found it so accessible and honestly hard to put down. I've taken a positive discipline class, so much of this information wasn't new per se, but I liked the way she presented it. She talked about the 4 mistaken goals of attention that I didn't realize built on each other.
She has another book about not raising entitled kids that I'm interested in, and then yesterday I found out there was a course she built that's a natural extension of this book. Since I need some more practice/regular reminders, I think I'm going to do it. It'll be helpful to start internalizing the "language", especially when my initial instinct when my son gets difficult is to react. If I can reduce that, I'll be able to discipline him in a more effective way.
I don't say this often (and maybe I need more time to let it ruminate), but this book felt life-changing to me. I've read a variety of books on gentleI don't say this often (and maybe I need more time to let it ruminate), but this book felt life-changing to me. I've read a variety of books on gentle parenting/positive parenting, but the way Markham frames her book struck a chord. She really focuses on 3 things (just 3) the parents need to do to connect with their kid: regulating yourself, fostering connection, and coaching, not controlling. Maybe it just stuck better with me this time! The first concept of regulating yourself really hit home--I'm more apt to snap and be disagreeable when I'm tired, or he's triggering me. But when I change my approach with my 4-year old, and really get down on his level and understand what he needs (even if he's throwing or about to throw a tantrum) our whole dynamic shifts. And the coaching not controlling concept--whew! I have a spirited kid who LOVES to control, and when I try to control, it's a recipe for disaster. I'm grateful to have read this - it came just at the right time!...more
I really love Satter's style--she seems so REASONABLE, and full of empathy and good cheer. This is a surprisingly dense book, and I seriously wish I'dI really love Satter's style--she seems so REASONABLE, and full of empathy and good cheer. This is a surprisingly dense book, and I seriously wish I'd read it when Ian was 3 months old. When you're off track with a kid's eating, it is SO hard (but she would say not impossible) to get back on track. I know all the things I did wrong, and I wish, more than any of my other parenting choices, I could do that part over. But alas, I cannot. We're really trying to eat together as a family, and I'm going to do an "eating immersion" over the holidays when he's home with us for 2 weeks so I can really get him used to eating what we're eating while I don't have to pack him a lunch that caters to his interests when he goes to school.
The next book I have of hers is "Secrets of feeding a healthy family" for more practical tips. But to me, she's the preeminent children's eating/feeding expert, and without having to do anything "weird"--she doesn't trick kids, feed them special meals, make their mashed potatoes a road for cars--none of that. Her feeding division of responsibility is so important--if you read nothing else, just read that and it'll change the way you think about feeding your kids!...more
I really loved this! After a while you feel like you've read every parenting approach in the world, but I really liked Glowacki's approach (and this cI really loved this! After a while you feel like you've read every parenting approach in the world, but I really liked Glowacki's approach (and this coming from someone who had varying degrees of success with her Oh Crap potty training method.) She talks about time management, a positive-style parenting approach, and some other approaches, and I really liked her tone and style (I should've written this review closer to when I read the book...I've slept since then). Overall it was just really practical and realistic. Her beliefs about discipline seem to be really focused on their physical (and emotional) needs, in a way that seemed like it would be effective. And my 4-year old and I were struggling more 6 months ago, but we seem to have leveled off. I'm trying a few different approaches, and they seem to be working (a little love and logic, a little positive discipline, a little bit of Oh Crap...) You have to switch out your tools depending on the need! Great read....more
This was simple to follow, and it's worked for me. The bottom line is that you have to be accountable for the choices you give your child. Are you jusThis was simple to follow, and it's worked for me. The bottom line is that you have to be accountable for the choices you give your child. Are you just talk? Or will you follow through on what you say? I really try hard to follow-through consistently, and my child is a TESTER. Ooh! He tests constantly. But he knows that when I say I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it (hopefully with as little drama as possible...that's where I struggle because of course my son knows how to push my buttons constantly.) That's doesn't always negate the screaming and drama (...from him...most of the time) but he's a good kid, especially when we see family, grandparents, or go out in public, so I feel like we're doing something right.
This method is very simple, concrete, and easy to follow. I like Positive Parenting, but it's much more involved. This is...simple. It's really about choices, and you following through with the choices offered....more
Loading...
